SCOTS Project - www.scottishcorpus.ac.uk Document : 352 Title : Conversation 08: Ayrshire woman and her mother Author(s): N/A Copyright holder(s): Prof John B Corbett SCOTS Project Audio transcription F639: Earliest Christmas memory, would be between the ages of two and a half and nine, when we were living in Treebank Crescent, and we had paraffin heaters in the house cause we didn't have central heating. And we ran out of paraffin, and I said I would walk with my dad down to the garage and get more paraffin. And I remember it clearly because it was a beautiful night, and it was very starry. And I remember holding my dad's hand, and being very small, and looking up and saying to him, "Do you think Santa's on his way?" because it was Christmas Eve, and dad saying, "No, I don't think he's out yet", and we we both stood and looked up at the stars and we couldn't see Santa. And erm, the reason it's so special is that dad remembered it years later, I reminded him of it, and it's become our little thing to share. We always remind each other about it on Christmas Eve. And eh, I was saying, I don't really remember Christmases at Treebank Crescent, but I do remember Christmases at Fourhill Road. F640: mmhm F639: And eh, John and I were not children who got up very early in the morning, we would get up at our normal time, have our breakfast and then go through and open our presents. The anticipation was great, waiting for erm, F640: The anticipation was probably better //than the realisation! [laugh]// F639: //better than the realisation! [laugh]// //[laugh]// F640: //[laugh]// F639: Sadly! //And eh,// F640: //[laugh]// F639: no, we did fine, we did fine, and ehm as you said, Nana and Papa, you, I think every, every Christmas they came for dinner. And I was saying to Dan, yesterday, that Christmas was always, it always felt like a Sunday, //no matter// F641: //mmhm// F639: what day of the week it was. Because you didn't, you were usually in the house all day, so the feelin of Christmas by the end of Christmas day, I always felt just a little bit claustrophobic, //because I hadn't been outside; there was always// F641: //[laugh]// F639: //that feelin of.// F640: //Can you imagine what your// what I felt like? //[laugh]// F639: //You must have been havin the screamin heebie-jeebies then, [laugh]// F641: //[laugh]// F639: [inaudible] that feelin of not gettin out, not gettin fresh air and by the end of the day, you just, maybe hit-, had a little bit stuffy head, and you felt //a little bit claustrophobic cause you hadn't been out.// F641: //mmhm mm// F639: So it was always a peculiar day, but, Nana and Papa came, we would have dinner about three o'clock in the //afternoon, eh.// F641: //[?]Or[/?], what did you eat?// F639: Oh well, traditional. //We had// F641: //Turkey?// F639: ehm, oh we just had soup, //maybe to start,// F640: //Soup, usually.// //mmhm// F639: //maybe a different// kind of soup every year. But we always had traditional turkey, //brussels sprouts, roasted potatoes.// F640: //Brussels sprouts, roast potatoes.// Cream potatoes. F639: Cream potatoes, eh chipolata sausages, F640: Cranberry //sauce.// F639: //Cranberry// sauce, bread pu- bread sauce. And then obviously Christmas pudding; did we have anything as well as Christmas //pudding?// F640: //No.// F639: //No, just Christmas pudding.// F641: //Was this home-made// //Christmas pudding?// F640: //oh// //no, no.// F639: //mm, no.// //you probably bought it.// F641: //No?// F639: I'll let mum, she can go, Christmas from her perspective, //ehm// F641: //[laugh]// F639: the work involved. //And eh// F641: //[laugh]// F639: brandy butter, //or cream.// F640: //uh-huh// F639: I don't remember liking the brandy butter too //much when I was young.// F640: //mmhm// F639: And, eh F640: And then, //at rout-// F641: //[inaudible]// F639: Later on, cause, we would always have just a snack, maybe a cold turkey sandwich later at night. //No? No.// F640: //No. No. Later on your aunt// Mary, and her husband and S- your cousin came //in.// F639: //Came in.// Right. F640: And I reset the table, and it was a cup of tea, //with// F639: //mmhm// F640: sandwiches, F639: Right. F640: mincemeat //pies,// F639: //Right.// //oh// F640: //and// Christmas cake. F639: Oh that's right, now, that's right. Aye, cause like we can go on to New Year, after that, cause I have that. //Auntie Mary's cherry// F640: //[?]Oh do you?[/?]// F639: cherry cake, that I loved, that she used to, did she //make it?// F640: //oh you went to your// Nana's at New Year. F639: And she brought, did she make //make the cherry cake, was that home-made?// F640: //And Nana always made that very// special; it was tinned salmon sandwiches. //[laugh]// F639: //[laugh]// F641: //[laugh]// mm //mm// F640: //Oh did your Auntie// Mary bring cherry cake? //No, she wouldn't have made it. No.// F639: //And I loved. She wouldn't have made it, that was.// I love cherry cake! Anyway, F640: Oh I take yer Uncle //Bill,// F639: //I can't// think if I've got any //other Christmas// F640: //I take our// Uncle Bill one every year. Seven pounds //[?]it was.[/?]// F639: //I loved those// cherry cakes, oh I loved it. I can't think of any other. We never got snow, at //Christmas// F640: //No.// F639: cause we lived beside the sea. //No.// F640: //No, we never got snow.// F639: I have one memory of snow when we were livin in Treebank Crescent. I've one memory //of goin out and// F641: //mm// F639: playin on the cul-de-sac, //in the snow and// F641: //mmhm// F639: watchin the snow comin down, standing at the window, we'd erm metal blinds, //Venetian blinds and// F641: //mmhm// F639: standin watchin the snow comin down. But I I can only remember that happening once; it maybe happened more, but. F640: And the strange thing was, when they were young, as far as I can remember, they only got the gifts from us. We didn't get gifts, they didn't get gifts //from aunties.// F641: //mmhm from// aunties, I see. F640: Well you got something from your //Nana and Papa, but we// F639: //Nana and Papa, I would th-.// F640: didn't exchange gifts F639: //No.// F641: //With the// //rest of the family.// F640: //with the sisters, you know?// I didn't buy the nieces and nephews, and they never got anything //back.// F639: //And we got something// from Santa. F640: mmhm F639: A Santa gift. F640: Well it was a Santa gift. F639: Santa gave it in addition to one from //you and Dad?// F640: //No.// F639: No it was just a Sa- , cause I yeah, cause I need to get all this right for Sam. [laugh] //[laugh]// F640: //[laugh]// F641: //[laugh]// F639: I don't know what. I couldn't. Do we give him one plus a Santa gift, or is it just from Santa under the tree? Right. //Get it right.// F640: //Well it wasn't under the// tree; it was in your stocking. F639: In your //stocking.// F640: //Cause you hung// your stocking up. F639: Right. F640: You pegged it up, //somewhere that// F639: //mmhm// And it was one of Dad's socks. F640: mmhm, //oh aye the biggest we could// F639: //Biggest stocking! [laugh]// F641: //oh was it? [laugh]// F639: //No it wasn't,// F640: //find.// F639: you know, nowadays you have the nice, you know, you //can buy them.// F641: //Sure.// F639: //But no, it was, it was one, er,// F640: //oh, no it was// F639: //we looked for the biggest// F641: //It was a real?// F639: sock he had! [laugh], //[laugh],// F640: //[laugh]// F641: //[laugh]// F639: you know, and then, it was, it was a real sock that we put up, we hung up. We didn't have a a mantelpiece though; where did we put it? F640: I think we just put it at the back of a chair, with //[inaudible]// F639: //We just, I think// we just lay it across the back of the chair, that's //right.// F640: //mmhm// F641: //mmhm// F639: And that. And that's right, cause John had a chair, and that //was designated// F641: //mmhm// F639: that's where John's presents would be, and then I had a chair and that's where my presents would be. //And// F641: //mmhm// F639: we hung our stocking. And we left, of course, I remember doing that at Treebank Crescent, a glass of milk //and, something for the reindeer.// F641: //oh yes, [?]some cake[/?],// oh for the reindeer! //Carrots?// F639: //Carrots for// F640: //mmhm// F639: the reindeer. And of course, it would be the empty glass would be there and the empty plate in the morning, you'd go //oh S-S-// F640: //It was the magic of.// F639: Santa's been, cause there he'd drunk the milk, //and he'd had the carr-,// F641: //mmhm// F639: the reindeer'd had the carrot. So you knew he'd been. //I do remember that.// F641: //Yeah.// F640: But because there were four of us in the fa-, four children in our family, we had a mantelpiece, but we put two chairs at a distance apart and tied the clothes rope F641: oh F640: from one chair to the other and our stockings were pegged up F641: uh-huh F640: there. But, ehm, we didn't have a special meal at Christmas, because my father, in those days, especially in Scotland anyway, England might have been different, but in Scotland your father worked on Christmas day. It was an ordinary, and Scotland didn't really ehm celebrate Christmas by not working; they still worked. And, ehm, of course, we only got one small toy, whatever it was, and a a small orange, and a coin, not a large coin, a very small coin, at the bottom of the stocking, and again it was m- one of my father's //socks, that// F641: //Socks.// F640: that were up. But we didn't have a special meal at Christmas time, eh, there was still the magic of Christmas day, but because my father worked, we didn't have //turkey,// F641: //mmhm// F640: we well, I never, I didn't know what turkey was, at that time, //[laugh].// F641: //[laugh]// F640: So we didn't have a special meal; the special time was at New Year, F641: Okay. F640: because, eh, my Dad got two days off, F641: mmhm F640: erm, the, and the shops were shut for two days. Well having six in the family, including my mum and dad, and pe- visitors coming in, there was a big shopping done. And we had a tut a boiler in our kitchen, where we boiled the clothes, a gas boiler, F641: mmhm F640: so that boiler was lined with clean dish-towels, //and my mother// F641: //mmhm// F640: bought bread and scones and cake, and filled the boiler up, [laugh] //with// F641: //mmhm// F640: food, enough to get us through, over the two-day holiday. And it was always the, so New Year's Day was the special meal. //Wh-// F641: //mmhm// F640: it was always a boiling fowl, //which my mother// F641: //mmhm// F640: boiled, because she could make soup with the stock. //And// F639: //Yeah.// F641: //uh-huh// F640: you always got a, just, to me even in those days, it was a small piece of this boiling fowl; there was never enough, and that's why I think I love chicken, //to this day, because I// F639: //[laugh]// F640: //can still taste// F641: //[?]eat so much[/?]// F640: that piece of of of boiling fowl, that was, you know it was never, you never, you didn't say you wanted more, but there was never enough there. And ehm she would eh, boil a tongue, an ox tongue. F641: mmhm F640: And then she would put it betee- between two plates to press it, you know, pressed tongue. //And you put// F639: //mm// F641: //Yeah, yeah.// F640: s- heavy books or something on top of it, so there was always tongue. And then, eh, the day after New Year, eh there was always a big steak pie. Cause you usually had people, well somebody, you know, ma- my aunt, or so-called aunt from Kilmarnock would maybe come that day. And, ehm, if you had visitors of course, the eh, you di- you didn't have a dining room; you had a living room which also //had a drop-leaf// F641: //mmhm// F640: table, so there was never enough space for everyone to to sit round the table. F639: So it was //buffet-style?// F640: //So the adults// always, no, //the adults ate// F639: //[inaudible]// F640: first. F641: mmhm F640: Er, it didn't matter, even, that's not just at New Year, I mean if if anybody ever came, at any time, the adults ate first and you sat in a chair, [laugh] //patiently starving, patiently waiting your turn// F639: //[laugh] Changed days! Can you imagine that happening now?// F641: //[laugh]// F640: to to eat, and hoping, you know, there'd be //enough left.// F641: //And hoping there would be// [laugh] F640: But the thing was ehm, if eh, someone brought a a young person with them, they were allowed to be at the table. //with the adults,// F639: //[?]No way![/?]// F640: uh-huh, but we had to sit and wait until they were finished before, before we got ours. So that was really quite different. //And my mother// F641: //mmhm// F640: was, and father especially, father didn't really say much, but we knew by his look that, ehm, you know, we had to behave ourselves //and be very mannerly at the table.// F641: //mmhm mm// F640: My mother really taught us the manners, but my father eh made sure //that they were carried out,// F641: //[inaudible] yeah.// F640: you know, and you couldn't, you know, you had to //to ask to be excused from the table, "please may I// F641: //[inaudible] enforce [laugh]// F640: leave the table?" You could not leave the table until, you know, you had said that, until everybody was finished. But as I say it was really New Year time. Christmas was a nice time, but, it was not special as far as a meal was concerned, and //We nev- we never had// F641: //uh-huh// F640: guests; I had no relatives that stayed in the same town. F641: uh-huh //So, and did you go to// F640: //So, you never h-// F641: to relatives later on, or? F640: No, because they, no not, no, because they stayed at a distance away, you'd have to have gone by bus. F641: uh-huh F640: We didn't have a car of course. Didn't have a car, didn't have a telephone. F641: mmhm F640: Didn't have a fridge. I didn't have a fridge, actually, till I was, till we went to Treebank eh Crescent. I would be, [inhale], nearly, what, maybe eight years married before I ever had a fridge. So you shopped mainly every day. F641: Can you think of that? //[laugh]// F639: //mmhm!// //mm// F640: //And therefore you bought// meat; I mean if you bought meat, you cooked it, or you maybe kee- kept the meat in a cool place F641: [cough] F640: for one day and then cooked it. So you really shopped. And ehm, oh aye my mother didn't have a fridge, didn't have a fridge or anything like that. //mmhm and,// F639: //Most people now have two fridges.// F641: //mmhm// F640: in the summertime F641: And the freezer. F639: //And the freezer.// F640: //We d-// we did have good weather, //quite often in the summertime,// F641: //mmhm// F640: when I was young, I mean we did have nice summer days that were really hot. So m- my mother had to put the milk and the butter. She would ehm, fill a a big dish with cold //water, and sit it in to keep// F641: //With cold water, yeah, I remember.// F640: cold water to ke- keep it //cool.// F639: //But you'd just// //be shoppin every day.// F640: //But you really shopped// //about every day.// F639: //Yes.// you'd only get enough milk to last F640: mmhm F639: //a day or// F641: //mmhm// F639: so, cause it'd go off. F641: Yeah. F639: mmhm F641: It's quite different from now. F639: Yeah, well, yeah. F640: And I mean you didn't have central heating, we didn't. It was only ehm, the winter that, before we left Treebank, we never really had a winter out of it; we had a an electric fire in the living room, and we had a par- paraffin //heater downstairs, and a paraffin heater at the top of the stairs,// F639: //uh-huh [inaudible] at the top of the stairs.// //I remember that, the condensation.// F640: //which was awful really, cause you got the smell from.// But it wasn't; they weren't good really. But, then the winter bef- just before we left, we never really got using it, I put, I wh- a storage heater at the bottom of the stair, your Uncle Jim did it, remember, and a storage heater in the dining, cause it was a dining-kitchen area, erm. So, yeah, she didn't really have central heating, so, but you survived it, //I mean.// F639: //mmhm// F640: Put hot-water bottles in bed at night and F641: [laugh] F639: //Well I lived in plenty of// F640: //didn't have an electric blanket.// F639: er student accommodation that didn't have central heating, oh, you used to wake up in the morning and ah, you could see your breath in the bedroom; //it was so cold!// F641: //[laugh]// //Icicles in the wi- in the window!// F639: //I had more clothes in bed than out of bed,// oh yeah it was cold in some of those places I lived in, freezing cold! F641: mm F639: We're spoiled now. F641: oh definitely! [laugh] //[inaudible]// F639: //But then, much happier!// //[laugh]// F640: //[laugh]// F641: //[laugh]// F639: I'm not going back to no central heatin. [inhale] F640: //So I don't know what// F641: //No.// F640: else we can think about; that's //sort of covered Christmas// F639: //No [inaudible]// //and you used// F640: //and New Year.// F639: to clean the house, from top to bottom, the //house.// F640: //Oh at New// Year. F639: Yeah. //and you had to, all your bills,// F640: //oh yes, mmhm// F639: had to be paid. //There was, there were a lot of superstitions.// F640: //Well, mmhm.// About New Year. //You didn't// F639: //About New Year.// F641: //Yeah.// F640: go into the New Year with debt. //You paid everything before the New Year.// F641: //ah okay, mmhm// F640: You cleaned the house - really cleaned the house - F639: mmhm F640: eh for New Year. F641: For New Year. //So// F640: //er// F641: did you help your mum? F640: No! //No. [laugh]// F639: //Never, never!// F641: //[laugh]// F639: //[laugh]// F640: //Quite often we bought// new cushion covers and chair covers and things like that, F639: mmhm F640: for New Year coming in, Because you did expect to have //visitors.// F639: //Company.// F641: uh-huh F640: You know, to have company. But, F641: Do do you have any, do you have any superstitions, or things you do //for New Year?// F640: //Yes.// //Yes, well, s-,// F641: //What kind of thing?// F640: your first, you know the first person who came to the door, had to be, was called your "First Foot", F641: uh-huh F640: And, they had to be dark-haired. F641: Why? F640: Because dark-haired people were lucky; it was unlucky to get a red-headed //person or a blonde.// F641: //I see, uh-huh// [laugh] //[laugh]// F639: //And I// F640: //uh-huh// F639: think that goes back to the Vikings; that's my theory, or maybe I've read it somewhere. Where erm //blonde people were unlucky,// F640: //And they had to be carrying a piece of coal.// F641: mm F639: So it was like the Viking invasion, //the blonde.// F641: //[?]In vain[/?]// mmhm F639: So dark people, dark-haired people F641: Were friendly and F639: were yeah lucky. //[inaudible]// F640: //And they'd b-, they would carry a piece of coal,// in their hand, that //was [inaudible]// F641: //uh-huh// //To bring warmth for the// F640: //good luck.// F639: //"Lang may yer// F641: //hands, eh?// F639: lum reek", you'd to throw it in the fire, and say "Lang may yer lum reek", "Long may your chimney //smoke",// F640: //Smoke,// because that meant you would be pro-, you know, have //enough coal to to heat the house.// F639: //Always have heat to warm,// yeah. F640: And eh, of course, in those days, the only time you had alcohol in the house was at New Year. F641: mm F640: You didn't have alcohol, because we didn't drink, we didn't drink at all. But at New Year, you, but I mean, you had only, maybe a, you know, a bottle of whisky and a bottle of sherry, something like that, I mean you didn't have a whole variety of //drink in,// F641: //mmhm// F640: erm, So it was, even, you know, when I was young, I mean my father, who did like a drink, //did only// F641: //mmhm// F640: have drink in the house at New Year. And you had, ehm, fruit loaf, //eh, not// F641: //mmhm// F640: fruit loaf, fruit cake, and shortbread of course. F641: mmhm F640: Ehm, and you really had to, I mean anybody, and and you said a "Happy New Year" to people, you celebrated New Year, I think you stopped saying "Happy New Year" to people up to about the eleventh of January, F639: //mmhm// F641: //uh-huh,// //ah because it's the beginning of the New Year [inaudible].// F640: //you know, mmhm [inaudible].// It's not just for that //short period of time,// F641: //For the day, yeah.// F640: erm. Yes, there were these sort of things that were expected, of you, as I say, with your shortbread, your your cherry cake and your fruitcake. Ginger wine of course! You made ginger wine for the children. F641: oh for the children. //uh-huh// F640: //For the children.// And for anybody who happened to be non-drinkers that came in, which weren't very //many,// F641: //mmhm// F639: [laugh] //[laugh]// F640: //eh in our family.// F641: //[laugh]// I enjoy the smell of Christmas time round the house, F640: uh-huh F641: the smell of the the ginger wine, obviously, but of the cooking and all the sweets, and things that //houses smell.// F640: //Well, the smell of// Christmas to me is actually of a very old-fashioned electric fire my mother //had, [laugh]// F641: //[laugh]// F640: which was plugged in when, while, because again you had no central heating; you had one coal fire, ehm and this this heater, when it was plugged in, for you to op- you know when it was time for you to open your presents, you //you know, you did it// F641: //eh// F640: in the bedroom because your your sock was at the bottom of //the bed when I was young.// F641: //mm// uh-huh F640: You, well, when I was very young it was hung //at the bottom of the bed, and then we put it on this// F639: //[inaudible] and then [inaudible]// F640: clothes rope when you went through to the living room when you were older. But Christmas to me was the smell of that electric //fire,// F639: //[inaudible]// F640: and, you know, I used it when I, and when I worked, I took it into the clinic where I worked, and plugged it in if necessary, and it still had that //smell! [laugh].// F641: //[laugh]// F640: But eh aye, it's just the the //things, but I I mean// F639: //mmhm// F640: quite honestly, New Year I remember. I remember Christmas //but New Year was more// F639: //You didn't, did you do a// Christmas tree or anything? F640: I can't remember if I'd a Christmas tree; it certainly wasn't a a - I can't remember having a real one, oh jings, it's yer Auntie Margaret really //you should be asking, but// F639: //mm// F640: we certainly had decorations up. //We had decorations up.// F639: //mm Paper// //chains and things [?]did you make them all yourself?[/?]// F640: //Well paper chains at the beginning,// and then you bought them, and they went from the middle of the light //to each corner of the room.// F639: //mmhm mmhm// F640: ehm you know the decorations set went up for Christmas, my mother always always did that. F639: mm you did that for us; we decorated when we were //young.// F640: //oh// uh-huh F639: We used to have decorations up, cause it always, when you took them down, you know in //January, the place was so bare!// F640: //The place was bare!// F641: Yeah. F639: //You know, you// F640: //And one// especially was a big paper bell, which //hung at at the window, remember?// F639: //That's right, the window big// paper bell, and and just like paper, or sort of, the the shiny balls, //hangin from the corners,// F641: //mmhm mmhm// F639: and things, I remember that, and then, you know, a face of a s- of a Santa Claus hanging up and snowmen, and F641: mm //Did you used// F639: //I remember that.// F641: to put up a nativity scene or //er?// F640: //No.// F639: //We never had// F641: //No?// F639: a nativity scene, no. F640: Because when I was very young I didn't really go to church, we didn't, well my parents never went to church. erm F641: When did you start going and why? F640: Er I started going, I think, whether my mother did go once or twice to this congregational church and I started I must have started quite y- young, maybe about twelve, thirteen, to go, and I went with, and my brother, well, he's two years younger, but we did eventually go together, my brother and myself, wh-, because I was teaching Sunday School when I was fourteen, F641: mm F640: so I must have gone //before that, must have been,// F639: //mmhm// F641: //Sure.// F640: uh-huh ehm My mother had belonged to a church before she was married. But, once she was married, she didn't, well, she started having a //family quite quickly and// F639: //Yeah, she did.// F640: she didn't go back, and my father certainly ehm was not connected to a church. And I was actually, ehm, we had never been baptised. F641: mm F640: when we were babies, //because my father// F641: //No?// F640: probably wouldn't have gone and done it, ehm, he didn't eh express any views about anything, but he wouldn't have done that, I don't think, he wouldn't have gone to a church and stood. So, ehm, wh- when I was ten, so my brother would be eight, my other sister would be thirteen and my other sister would be fourteen, ehm, oh my mother, I'll tell I'll tell you what happened, there was a church, a Lochside church in our area, and I think my mother had gone to that church once or twice, I think I went to that Sunday School actually. I did go to the Sunday School for a wee while but I didn't like it very much. But she must have spoken to the minister and said we'd never been baptised, tut, christened as we call it, we'd never been christened. F641: mmhm F640: And eh, he had said, well it was never too late; he would do it. And eh he came to the house, F641: mmhm F640: one night, and and that, this, well she'd my mu- been my mother's friend when she was young, her pal, and but we ca-, so we called her "aunt", and she stayed in Kilmarnock, and she came down to be probably a sort of witness, but my father wouldn't, he never came. //He stayed// F641: //mmhm// F640: away //from the house,// F641: //mmhm// F640: ehm, and I can remember, I mean I can remember being christened; we a- the four of us sat along the couch waiting for the minister to come, and the minister was a tiny little man called Mr Paterson, eh, so much so that I think my sister Mary, especially, would be taller than he //was. And I can always// F639: //[laugh]// F641: //[laugh]// F640: remember, you know, my mother put a nice cloth on the drop-leaf table, and she had a, her, it wasn't real crystal, it was a cut-glass sugar-bowl. F641: mmhm F640: where the water, //the water was in that, and// F641: //[inaudible]// F640: so I can remember, I can v- vividly remember being christened, [inhale] but, as I say I must have gone to that s- Lochside Sunday School for a little while, and then for some reason, I don't know why, we got to this congregational church. And eh, as I say, by the time I was fourteen, I was eh teaching Sunday School. And my brother, at age sixteen, became a Deacon, which is the same as an Elder in the church, //although he// F641: //mm// F640: has since, you know, has had no connection with the church since then. But we did go through, we went through Youth Fellowship, //ehm you know,// F641: //mmhm// F640: together, my brother and I and and ehm, it was one of the best times in my life, because we had lovely company. I've still got friends, you know, that were in the Youth Fellowship with me. //And of course we were// F641: //mmhm// F640: married in that church. //But,// F641: //mmhm// F640: erm, no my my parents had no church connection //at all.// F641: //mmhm// F640: So therefore, but you know, in Scotland, well, when you die //the minister of// F641: //mm// F640: the parish is bound to to attend the funeral F641: mmhm F640: you know, you don't need to belong to a church eh to have a minister, it's the minister of that parish F641: mmhm //mmhm// F640: //who does the funeral,// so when my mother and father died it was the minister of the Auld Kirk, which was the church nearest their house, who attended the funeral, which is very difficult, because you don't know the person; you've to be //told. Aye.// F639: //mmhm// F641: //Yes of course, mmhm// F640: I mean, you know? F641: Yeah. Did you used to go to church, //when you were little?// F639: //mmhm, yeah.// F640: //They went// //to Sunday School.// F639: //We went to// Sunday School, and we went to church, right really till I went to University, and then I I sort of stopped going. And I haven't gone regularly, F641: mmhm F639: //since then.// F640: //And I never forced// //it although, you// F639: //mm erm// F640: know her daddy was always in it; well, became an Elder //in the church.// F641: //Yes.// F640: We never forced it, but there's always the famous story that we tell about when I was, I used to go to church and and eh they went in to Sunday School. F639: And I didn't enjoy Sunday //School.// F640: //mmhm// F641: //No?// Why not? F639: [suck] I just, eh I just don't remember enjoying it, I just don't I don't think I really liked the other kids that were there //that much,// F641: //mmhm// //[laugh]// F640: //mm// F639: And I was quite //shy, as well.// F640: //Because it wasn't like// it wasn't like school; they don't have to behave themselves. //They're not kept// F639: //Yeah.// F640: under strict control, [laugh] so they can be rather //boisterous, which Alison didn't like.// F639: //It is, yes.// Yeah. I don't really remember exactly. I just don't remember, you know, enjoying it that much. There was, yeah, there was a lot of running around and you were in a hall, and didn't //suit me.// F640: //When it came// to a certain age, you just stopped and we just accepted //that. We didn't mmhm.// F639: //And I went to church instead. I sat through the church service,// F640: mmhm F639: ehm which [laugh] I probably didn't really enjoy that much either. [laugh] //[laugh] yeah.// F641: //[laugh] But it was better than it was!// F639: It's a shame. F641: I thought Sunday School was something like, you know, we would have catechism and religion, religious F640: They're told stories. //They're told a story.// F639: //They're told stories, [inaudible]// F641: //[?]Stories of[/?]// //the Bible or?// F639: //co-// colouring-in books, I mean I remember colouring in pictures and things at //Sunday School, and// F640: //uh-huh// F639: I mean, I'm glad I got the education, F641: mmhm F639: You know, and it's something that Dan and I need to figure out with Sam, because, you know, with Dan being Jewish, we have this, you know, what are we going to do? And we sometimes try and, we talk about it, but we can't quite figure out what to do, because, you know, Dan's not really interested in in Judaism, I mean he is interested in it on an in an intellectual level, but not really on a spiritual level. F641: mmhm F639: On a religious level, I won't say spiritual, cause that is s- something a little bit different. F641: mmhm F639: He probably is interested in it on a spiritual level, as I am interested in religion on a spiritual level, but, you know, we haven't quite figured out. //We would like Sam to have// F641: //Practical, the practical thing.// F639: some kind of //you know, education, cause you don't get it in the schools in the United States.// F641: //mmhm yes, absolutely. No.// F639: Complete separation of church //and state.// F641: //ah here too.// //[inaudible] school. mmhm// F639: //Oh no, you get it here, you get religious education in the schools here.// F641: Yeah. F639: But you you know you learn about all the religions in the schools here, but it's absolutely not taught in the States, because it's in the Constitution that you can't have it, you know ehm in the public public schools, [tut], but ehm so we, cause Sam, Sam wasn't baptised, we didn't have him christened, ehm you know, cause Dan wouldn't really have been comfortable standing up in a //Christian church.// F641: //Yeah, I see.// F639: But then, I didn't want him to have ehm a Jewish ceremony, necessarily, and I I didn't feel comfortable with that, because he's not Jewish; it goes through the female line. And he's, technically, he's not Jewish, //so.// F641: //You// never converted to, you didn't have a //religious, no?// F639: //No.// No, so he's, he's kind of caught in the middle. But, ehm yeah, we need to, we need to sort //something out.// F641: //Yeah, to feel// [inaudible] as well. F639: And it's a shame because actually the Presbyterian church close to us is, I I like it. //I'd probably be quite// F641: //mmhm// F639: comfortable going along to it, but I don't want to go on my own. F640: mmhm F639: //I feel as// F641: //mmhm// F639: if we do something I want it, us to do it as a family: I don't want to be going off on my own, you know, to do, to attend that, if Dan and Sam aren't involved in it. //So,// F641: //Yeah, of course.// F639: we'll see. We'll have to think about it. F641: Yeah. Yeah, there's time. //[laugh] yeah.// F639: //oh there is time, there is// time, and as you say it's never too late. I mean maybe down the line we'll decide we want to //get him baptised,// F641: //mmhm// F639: or I would say, you know, I do feel as if it is important to me to have him baptised, and we can do it when he's older, or he can decide, F640: //mmhm// F641: //[inaudible]// F639: //I mean what I would like, ideally,// F640: //Well, you and John were baptised of course, but I don't know if I would do it now.// F641: mm //I think I would, I// F639: //ideally, I would// F640: //I don't think it's so important.// F641: I I personally would still, //uh-huh.// F639: //Yeah.// I mean, ideally I would like for Sam to know about both. //And that's I think// F641: //mmhm// F639: what we will try and do, but we have to work out how we're going //do that and then// F641: //mmhm// F639: let him decide when he's older, I mean he may decide he's interested in Judaism, //or he may decide,// F641: //mm// F639: "no I want to attend..." F640: Or he might do neither! F639: //Or he might do// F641: //[laugh]// F639: neither, but I'd like him to be, but, you know, I I think it's important that you get the the chance to find out, so you //can make the// F641: //mmhm// F639: decision, rather than, as you say, your parents didn't go to church, so you didn't really know anything. And I always remember my friend Gillian. She was never, never went to Sunday School, her parents never went to church. She always felt there was something //missing.// F641: //mm// F639: And she now goes to church, and and has just had both her girls, who are about eight and five, baptised. As as older children. //They went// F640: //mmhm// F641: //mmhm// F639: through a ceremony, cause she never had them baptised as babies. //And// F641: //mm// F639: eh so, but she said she she would have liked to have known a bit more about it. So there's that side as well, you think, well, //I'd like// F641: //Yeah.// F639: to maybe at least know, and I think it's really important, I mean, apart from just living in society, but, you need to know, I think, even just for, to be able to study literature properly, you have to know //the allusions// F641: //mmhm// F639: to the Bible or to religion. You have to know what the stories are, //you know.// F641: //Yeah.// F639: Even if you think they're just stories. They're good stories. //You need to know about them, you know?// F641: //[laugh] mmhm yeah.// F639: You can't say, "well, I I've no idea who Noah is," or Moses, //or, you know, the New Testament.// F641: //[laugh] mmhm// F639: "I don't know anything about //it."// F640: //Well, that's what// John said once, wasn't it, that //one of the best// F639: //mmhm// F640: things that happened to him was getting the Gideon Bible, //at// F639: //mmhm// F640: you when you went to Belmont, //didn't you, you all got a Gideon Bible.// F639: //I read the whole thing.// F640: And he read it so, when he went to University, I mean, when things were coming up as you say in literature, he knew //about it.// F639: //You know what// they're referring to, I mean even in poetry, you //think, well if you don't// F640: //mmhm// F639: have a background in that. Even if you don't necessarily go down a hundred percent the belief, you know, that you //think// F640: //mmhm// F639: it's still, it's part of, you know, the world, //and the culture, and, you have to, yeah.// F641: //mmhm yeah, yeah it's part of culture and knowledge, yeah.// F639: Yeah, even if you, your faith isn't quite goin down that road. F641: mmhm F639: But erm, so, //but as I// F641: //mm// F639: say, we need to to work that out. F641: Yeah. mm yeah, //do you enjoy Christmases now?// F639: //[inaudible]// F640: //oh yes!// F641: //Celebrating// Christmas nowadays? F639: //I do I'd say, yeah.// F640: //I but, uh-huh.// F639: Yes I do. I think now I probably enjoy it more with Sam. F641: [laugh] yeah. F639: You know, it was, I've always loved Christmas. //I've always loved it.// F640: //I just// I just would like, eh, it was nice that other night when we went to Bob and Christine's because that's always the sort of thing I would want to do. I feel that you, we don't have, leading up to Christmas, we d- it's not that we d-, well especially for me, I do have the time, I'm not that busy now, especially if I'm not in- involved in doing a Christmas day dinner. You don't take the time for the lead-up to //Christmas, to spend time with// F641: //mmhm// F639: //With people.// F640: //friends,// F639: mmhm F640: //and// F641: //Yeah.// F640: people and do something, even although it's just simple, like having them along for a coffee or something. erm and I really of course I, well, w- we didn't go to any church services, because although I I I am ba- I didn't go to church for a long time, I was very involved when I was young, as I say at th- that time in the Youth Fellowship it was a wonderful time in my life, but as the years have gone on, with the children, you didn't go ba-, you didn't go to church, didn't take time to go to church, erm, and I've gone back, since I've left work, to going back to church again, but it's //um it's// F641: //It's not the same, huh.// F640: no, well I I can't say I go, well, because I've got firm beliefs. I don't have //firms beliefs, I'm// F641: //mm// F640: still searching. I don't know what's, I was, I was very very sure when I was in my teenage years, F639: mmhm F640: because it was something th- that I could hang on to. //It it gave me// F641: //mmhm// F639: //mmhm// F640: //something that I could// hang on to, it gave me something eh to believe in, but //you know, so so I am// F641: //[inaudible] yeah.// F640: s- sorry to say that I didn't go to any of the the services, you know, round //Christmas time.// F641: //mmhm// F639: Well, I can honestly say when I was young, the religious side of it was very important to me at //Christmas.// F641: //mmhm// F639: I really loved the Christmas story. F641: mmhm F639: And I can remember just, I would think about it, and Christmas Eve I would imagine in my head Mary and Joseph makin that long //journey,// F641: //mmhm// //mmhm// F639: //you know to// Bethlehem. I mean I really, you know and I think because I always sang in the choir at Christmas time, and I loved singing at the Christmas, you know the school //Christmas service,// F641: //mm mm// mmhm F639: We used to go along to Castlewood Church and sing, and I loved the Christmas songs, and I actually I really feel it wasn't the commercial side of it. F641: mmhm F639: You know, I really loved the Christmas story, and I I really, you know, it meant something to me. And I think F640: Well that's maybe part of it too, that the commercialism side has crept //in so much// F639: //Yeah.// //Too much [inaudible]// F641: //People complain// they're so busy nowadays //they never have// F640: //Well that's it// //but you know you get// F641: //time.// F639: //[inaudible]// F640: //people in the shops and if, or if you meet someone they'll say,// "Isn't this a nightmare?" //It's not supposed// F639: //Well, I know and it's [inaudible]// F641: //[laugh]// F639: //[inaudible] no it's not.// F640: //to be a nightmare, and I think we're// really, it will n-, it'll never happen. But we're really needin to get back to the basics, because although we s- talk about when we were young, we only got one toy and we only got //a piece of fruit or something.// F641: //mmhm// F639: //That's [inaudible] but people, it's not going to go back to that,// F640: //And, it's// //never goin to go back// F641: //No.// F639: //it's never going to go.// F640: //to that, but// But but that actually was a better time, //because// F639: //mmhm// F640: it wasn't, all this //commercialism or// F639: //[inaudible]// //is, or// F641: //Yeah, you know.// F639: you know the, //and people, it shouldn't be as// F640: //It it wasn't a nightmare, it wasn't// //a nightmare.// F639: //stressful.// F641: //No.// //[laugh]// F639: //[laugh]// F640: //You shopped// for one toy, you decided what you were getting, you shopped for it and that was it. //So it wasn't// F639: //Yeah.// F640: //the night-, a nightmare.// F641: //mmhm// F640: People find it F641: mm F640: horrendous, it's a nightmare, it's a worry, it's debt, //you know, what's the point of it?// F641: //Yeah, yeah.// F639: //Yeah.// F640: //[inaudible] you know?// F639: And I do miss ehm going to a Christmas service. F641: mmhm F639: But then again because I don't go regularly, I also feel a bit embarrassed. //I wouldn't just go and// F640: //mm// F641: //mmhm// F639: //turn up in church.// F640: //Well, when I say that I was there// last Sunday, I mean I don't go to the midnight service now, or //even a service// F639: //Yeah.// F640: at six o'clock but I was there last Sunday. And of course it wa- it was the children that were taking part, and I //enjoy that.// F639: //Yeah.// F640: //Aye,// F641: //mmhm// F640: I enjoy that side, I still //enjoy that// F641: //mmhm// F640: side of it, but as far as, I don't have, I I mean I'm not going to church and having very strong beliefs, I just //don't. I'm// F641: //mmhm// F640: I'm still very uncertain, but they say well that's what it's //all about.// F639: //That what it's// //all about.// F641: //Yeah.// F639: //hmm yeah, that's the thing, I// F640: //should always be searching, or wondering, but// //but I// F639: //mean I and I think// F641: //Yeah.// F639: //church isn't for everyone that's// F640: //feel sometimes I'm hy- I'm a hypocrite.// //I feel like a hypocrite, because I'm sitting// F639: //No, I don't think so.// F640: there, and yet I'm not one of these people //oh there are people there who really believe.// F639: //But then, the argument would be,// you're the person that should be going to church. Th- the church is meant for people that, you know it's meant for, it's not meant for everyone who's sitting there saying "Yeah, I've got all the answers and //I know// F640: //mmhm// F641: //Yeah.// F639: exactly what's goin on." And my feeling is why, I feel, is more for the community aspect. I feel as if I would like an avenue for being able to do something, //you know because the// F641: //mmhm// F639: church, seemingly, I mean the the church in in Bethesda, the local one, they do a lot of good stuff. And she's a very, the woman who's the the minister there, she's she's very, quite political. F641: mmhm //mm// F639: //An I like// listening to her speak, and sh- they do a lot of ehm you know stuff for the community, and they get involved in things, and I think it would be nice, because I don't feel as if I have, you know, and //an outlet to, to, you know,// F640: //Oh well, I'm ashamed to say I do nothing for the, in the church, now.// F639: do //something,// F641: //mmhm// F639: I mean I don't, I haven't, you know, I //just don't do// F641: //mmhm// F639: things for //for others// F641: //mmhm// F639: //and eh// F640: //[tut]// //Well,// F639: //I just feel that's the// F640: that's not really true. //You do sometimes. Look at that// F639: //Well I feel as if [inaudible]// F640: woman whose husband was ill and you made a meal and //that's I mean, you forget about that, you took you take meals// F639: //Yeah, that's [inaudible] things.// F640: round, well you have taken meals round for people. F639: Aye, it's it's smaller //things but.// F640: //You m- might// think it's a t- a small thing, but that's a big thing for the person that you're doing it for. F639: //That is true erm.// F641: //True, that's true mm.// //For for us it's eh// F639: //Yeah, I do feel// F641: Christmas is usually a time for family more than religion, I //think.// F639: //Yeah.// F640: //mmhm// //mmhm// F639: //Yeah.// //[inaudible]// F640: //Well that's what I// try to think //of it now, it's// F641: //uh-huh// F640: i- if nothing else, it should be a time for family to get //together.// F641: //uh-huh// //It was so nice, this// F639: //mmhm// //I know, this// F640: //mmhm// F641: //this time.// F639: was lovely, this was lo- and it's been such a long time, since we were all here, and it's just nice, I mean, you know, we've, the last two years, as long as this tape doesn't get played in America, I haven't, I haven't really enjoyed Christmas as much, //because// F641: //mmhm// F639: you know, Dan's family doesn't celebrate //Christmas, so it's not the same for me!// F641: //No, it's very different, of course, it's not the same,// //no.// F640: //mmhm// F639: You know, it's just, okay, we got together, but //to be honest it was,// F641: //So, it's// //a deal, you can come every year!// F639: //you know.// //[laugh]// F640: //[laugh]// F641: //[laugh]// //[laugh]// F639: //[laugh] I was kind of hoping next// F640: //Or we might make it one year to America, the four of us!// //[laugh]// F639: //year maybe you'll come to America. [laugh]// F641: //[laugh], well.// //[laugh]// F639: //[laugh]// F640: //[laugh]// //Cause we'll sleep in the basement,// F639: //[inaudible]// //oh absolut-// F640: //don't worry!// F639: we can //get you all in.// F641: //Who's to sleep in the basement?// //[laugh]// F639: //All in.// F640: //[laugh]// F639: //[inaudible]// F641: //We'll have to take the// //straws to see who'll go// F640: //[laugh]// //[laugh]// F639: //oh no.// F641: //[laugh]// F639: but you know, to the other end though, it's what you make it, and //we need to start// F640: //That's right.// F639: doin, we need to make our own traditions for Sam, //you know? That's// F641: //mmhm// //definitely.// F639: //right. Aye.// F640: //But I I think,// eh, I I feel that I've always tried, even, you know, when Alison and John were not around at //Christmas time.// F641: //mmhm// F640: I s-, I didn't sort of sit and mope and say, "oh well, //it's not worth// F641: //Yeah.// F639: //No.// F640: //doing anything.// //I always did something; always had// F639: //You've got to do.// F640: people in, or //we went// F639: //Yes.// F640: to to //family,// F641: //mmhm// F639: Yes. F640: erm, whereas, you know, you've heard me saying, I've got, you know, one sister who has never really, eh, I mean it, recently it's been worse because as I say when she gets her Christmas cards, she doesn't even sit her Christmas cards up. F639: Now we're starting to talk about people, so this'll have to be //censored.// F640: //I know.// //[laugh]// F639: //[laugh]// F641: //[laugh]// //[laugh] I know!// F640: //oh I hope she'll never hear this tape.// F639: //This might be the bit that goes on the Web.// F641: //[inaudible]// //[laugh] No!// F639: //[laugh] [inaudible]// F640: //[laugh]// //She doesn't have a computer.// F639: //She doesn't have it.// F641: //She hasn't got a computer.// //[laugh]// F639: //[laugh]// F640: //But it's true, it's// it's what, you've got to put something //into it,// F639: //Yeah.// //It is it is an attitude.// F640: //to get something out of// //it.// F639: //You can't// F641: //Yeah.// F639: and I realise that, you can't say, you've got to make it work for yourself. You can't assume that other people will make your, your, you know, your //traditions, or your enjoyment,// F641: //Your Christmas. [laugh]// F639: for you, //so,// F641: //Yeah.// F639: you know. That's what you've got to do, but eh, I have to say, it's, it is nice to be with family. //I mean your// F640: //mmhm// F641: //mmhm// F639: your own family. F641: uh-huh //Yeah.// F639: //ehm yeah, at// //this time.// F640: //Not that we're clannish!// F639: Not that we're clannish, //in any way!// F640: //[laugh]// F641: //[laugh], no no no, you'll start// //no, [laugh]// F639: //In any way, it is// F640: //[laugh]// F639: it's very special. //Very special.// F640: //I think we'd better get// //cracking.// F639: //I know.// That's half past two! This work is protected by copyright. All rights reserved. The SCOTS Project and the University of Glasgow do not necessarily endorse, support or recommend the views expressed in this document. Information about document and author: Audio Audio audience Adults (18+): For gender: Females Audience size: 3-5 Audio awareness & spontaneity Speaker awareness: Aware Degree of spontaneity: Spontaneous Audio footage information Original title: Conversation 8 Year of recording: 2002 Recording person id: 608 Size (min): 36 Size (mb): 139 Audio setting Private/personal: Recording venue: At home Geographic location of speech: Bridge of Weir, Renfrewshire Audio relationship between recorder/interviewer and speakers Family members or other close relationship: Speakers knew each other: Yes Audio speaker relationships Family members or other close relationship: Audio transcription information Transcriber id: 718 Year of transcription: 2004 Year material recorded: 2002 Word count: 8028 Audio type Conversation: Participant Participant details Participant id: 639 Gender: Female Decade of birth: 1960 Educational attainment: University Age left school: 18 Upbringing/religious beliefs: Protestantism Occupation: Education Researcher Place of birth: Ayr Region of birth: S Ayr Birthplace CSD dialect area: Ayr Country of birth: Scotland Place of residence: Bethesda Region of residence: Maryland, USA Country of residence: USA Father's occupation: Insurance Broker Father's place of birth: Auchinleck Father's region of birth: S Ayr Father's birthplace CSD dialect area: Ayr Father's country of birth: Scotland Mother's occupation: Homemaker/Administrator Mother's place of birth: Ayr Mother's region of birth: S Ayr Mother's birthplace CSD dialect area: Ayr Mother's country of birth: Scotland Languages: Language: English Speak: Yes Read: Yes Write: Yes Understand: Yes Circumstances: Work/home Language: French Speak: Yes Read: Yes Write: Yes Understand: Yes Circumstances: Language: Scots Speak: Yes Read: Yes Write: No Understand: Yes Circumstances: Home Participant Participant details Participant id: 640 Gender: Female Decade of birth: 1930 Educational attainment: GCSEs/O-Grades Age left school: 14 Upbringing/religious beliefs: Protestantism Occupation: Retired Place of birth: Ayr Region of birth: S Ayr Birthplace CSD dialect area: Ayr Country of birth: Scotland Place of residence: Ayr Region of residence: S Ayr Residence CSD dialect area: Ayr Country of residence: Scotland Father's occupation: Garage attendant/Driver Father's place of birth: Stranraer Father's region of birth: Wigtown Father's birthplace CSD dialect area: Wgt Father's country of birth: Scotland Mother's occupation: Housewife Mother's place of birth: Halifax Mother's region of birth: Nova Scotia Mother's birthplace CSD dialect area: Ayr Mother's country of birth: Canada Languages: Language: English Speak: Yes Read: Yes Write: Yes Understand: Yes Circumstances: At home Participant Participant details Participant id: 641