SCOTS
CMSW

Document 353

Conversation 03: Ayrshire couple on motorcycling

Author(s): N/A

Copyright holder(s): Prof John B Corbett, SCOTS Project

This document contains strong or offensive language

Audio transcription

M608 That's good. Where's mine? There?
F643 mmhm
M608 [inhale] That's great. Thank you. Well, cheers!
F643 Cheers, my dears!
M642 Slainte!
M608 Slainte!
M642 As I said earlier, 'Health and Happiness'.
M608 Health and Happiness? //[inaudible]//
M642 //The rest's// a bonus.
M608 mmhm [drinking] I mean I know, I know Louise is from Ayr, because I grew up with Louise, but I mean are you fr- also from //Ayr [inaudible]//
M642 //Louise is here.//
M608 Yeah.
F643 uh-huh
M642 You were gesturing towards our //young lady from Brazil.//
M608 //I just ge-, I just gesture at random.// //[laugh]//
M642 //[laugh]//
F643 //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]//
M642 Louise //is from Ayr, eh, [inaudible]//
F643 //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]//
M642 eh, f- God I've had a lot //to drink, [?]I'm done in[/?]//
M608 //But did, did,// did you grow up in Ayr as well?
M642 [click] oh very much so.
M608 mmhm
M642 I was born in, s-s-t-, no, not sou-, my sister was born in South Lodge.
M608 mmhm
M642 I was at Invercar,
M608 mmhm
M642 which I think it just off, Invercar was just off Castlehill Road.
F643 uh-huh yeah. mmhm
M642 //er//
M608 //oh right.//
M642 um My parents stayed and we stayed all our days //down in Ailsa//
F643 //[cough]//
M642 Place.
M608 oh right. //okay.//
M642 //Just// by the old fort.
M608 mm
M642 And, er, never moved from there. So, we can create a a half-mile, radius,
M608 mmhm
M642 and that's us.
M608 um, and have, I mean, have you lived outside Ayrshire?
M642 No.
M608 No?
M642 Other than Jordanhill.
M608 Other than Jordanhill? And that was for what, teacher training?
M642 Yeah, well, P.E.
M608 P.E., aye.
M642 Three years, Jordanhill.
M608 And did you actually live in Glasgow at the time?
M642 Monday to Friday, yeah.
M608 mm Yeah.
M642 So, well there's some that, a couple of photographs, there's another five or six of them that I just didn't [inaudible] copies of; that's Ayr Harbour.
M608 oh right.
F643 How many did you have of each? There was [exhale] how many harbour ones and how many country scenes, or //something?//
M642 //er, it was// about four or five of each of just the better ones? They're all just sitting; they they don't actually belong there.
M608 mmhm
M642 That was just I shoved them up, eh because Louise is doing a modification, //of erm//
F643 //oh aye. God.//
M642 some other stuff.
F643 The painted //frames [laugh]//
M642 //whereas that one up there, above the// the door is more important to me. //[inaudible]//
M608 //What's that?//
F643 That's the Boys' Own picture of //Stevie,//
M642 //Steve// Hislop, British Superbike Motorcycle Champion this year.
M608 oh right?
M642 And, that's er, he was down at North Harbour Motorcycles
M608 uh-huh
M642 and that's his 'wee Hizzy helmet'.
M608 huh
M642 //He's got//
F643 //[laugh]//
M642 the wee dervish Scottish cycle, kind of, it it's almost like the erm Tasmanian Devil,
M608 Aye.
M642 but in a kilt. //And that's//
M608 //[laugh]//
M642 Stevie's erm helmet. And he won the British Superbike Championship this year; he was second the year before.
M608 Right?
M642 And, er, he signed that for me, so that's up there. And [inaudible] just before we start. //erm, aye, have a look at//
M608 //Yeah, what type of cup was this [inaudible]//
M642 Aye, have a look at that cup and tell me what it is.
M608 er, well I know it's the Calcutta Cup,
F643 Cause, I I squealed on you.
M608 I squealed //[inaudible]//
M642 //ah// //thank you.//
F643 //er// [laugh] //[laugh]//
M608 //But I didn't,// didn't hear the story; so why are you drinking out the Calcutta Cup?
M642 er, Murrayfield, couple of years ago, when we last beat the English and er got the cup, and Davy Good's boy They they they they organised a a presentation dinner,
M608 mmhm
M642 for personalities and players of the year.
M608 mmhm
M642 and Davy's boy was Premiership Two Players' Player of the Year.
M608 mm
M642 So, there was about twelve of us went through from Ayr. And you had an invite to go through.
F643 mmhm, but it was a bus and I get travel //sick.//
M642 //A mini-// //bus, and didn't want to get through.//
F643 //[laugh]// [laugh]
M642 And it turned out; the bottom line originally was, that it was like thirty, forty quid a head, //at//
M608 //mm//
M642 Murrayfield.
M608 mmhm
M642 And, erm, the coach at the time, Rab Dale, said "Right, erm I don't get paid as the coach, I'm an amateur coach, so as representative of the club, we're going to go through, we're going to take a table and that's my fee for the year."
M608 oh right.
M642 [inhale] And, as far as the bus was concerned, we would share the cost of the bus, but then he went back to them afterwards and said "Hell, bloody mend you".
M608 mmhm
M642 So, it actually turned out that the whole night ended up free. I was quite prepared to pay my //yeah//
M608 //mmhm//
M642 twenty-five, thirty quid,
M608 Yeah.
M642 to go through But, erm, there was about twelve of us went through, in the mini-bus. Louise, Rab said "does she want to go?" and I asked her and she said, "no I cannae travel on a mini-bus." But, that was the first, the very first, so it's a shame in a way you didn't go to it. And it was all the big personalities were there, setting it up for the very first //time,//
M608 //mmhm//
F643 [gulp]
M642 as the Rugby Sports Personality Dinner Award.
M608 Right.
M642 And, er because we had happened to beat the English,
M608 They were just passing round //the cup, were they?//
M642 //And they had// the cup, aye, filled with eh the Famous Grouse, our sponsors.
M608 It was filled with whisky?
M642 Filled with whisky.
M608 So how much did you drink?
M642 eh I got there a wee bit late. //[laugh]//
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]//
M642 //But,//
F643 //[laugh]// [laugh]
M642 the point was, see on the table,
M608 Aye.
M642 the table was filled with cans of the sponsor's beer. Because, obviously, these brewers, distillers, are all part of conglomerates.
M608 Aye.
M642 So, There was so much on the table; miniatures of whisky, eh, wine, all the rest of it; it was all sitting there, absolutely buckshee,
M608 [laugh]
F643 [laugh]
M642 and, the cup, was absolutely, totally, filled to the brim with the Famous Grouse, and people were just told, "there it is; there's the cup", and there's a couple of security guards standing,
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //mmhm//
M642 erm, you know, sort of, what do you call them, 'First Past the Post', these people you see //[inaudible]//
M608 //mm//
M642 And, it was a matter of "just go up and help yourself", and it was so relaxed. It wasn't that kind of oh,
M608 Aye.
M642 you got your two mega-seconds People went up when they felt like it. the Calcutta Cup, yeah!
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
M642 And just took a sluggin, so, erm //[inaudible]//
F643 //The photo// And the photo's been, erm what is it //computer-edited,//
M642 //On the computer, aye.// //aye, because, there were other, all of them were, there were two of them frumpies in//
F643 //somewhat, cause there was some quite horrified-looking people [laugh] in the background, which spoils the look of the picture.//
M642 the background. //So I took them off//
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 You digitised them out?
M642 I //took my photograph//
F643 //Yeah.//
M642 up to the school, went to the Art Department, scanned it down into the Art Department computer, and then [?]pictelled[/?] out
M608 [laugh]
F643 The bad //[?]asses[/?]//
M642 //you know, aye,// //and left; I don't know who, I don't know who the guy is in the background.//
F643 //[laugh] because of who's in the background [laugh]//
M642 But it just, it needed a wee bit, where the pillar is, //I'm//
M608 //uh-huh//
M642 standing in front of, were two frumpy ladies.
M608 [laugh]
M642 //uh-huh, aye, so//
F643 //Like, with a grumpy expression, which//
M642 you get rid of them.
M608 Aye.
M642 But there's another picture of me and Davy, and we've, we're holding it between us.
F643 mmhm
M642 //And//
M608 //mmhm//
M642 that one needs to be done someday as well.
F643 //mmhm//
M608 //uh-huh//
M642 But I'm lucky. You know, to drink out the Calcutta Cup.
M608 oh aye.
M642 Yeah. //That's//
M608 //right.//
M642 that's good. So that, and Stevie. [inhale] Stevie broke his neck three years ago.
M608 Did he? I mean I don't follow super- //bike.//
M642 //He had// a a top side, and did a cartwheel and broke his neck.
M608 Right.
M642 And then came back a year later, and ended up second in the British Superbikes, and then, this year, won it.
M608 oh right. //Could you, are you into bikes as well?//
M642 //ah// oh aye. Aye, aye he's er he's what, for- forty this year. And do you know what happened for winning it?
M608 No.
M642 His team sacked him. //He's//
M608 //Why did//
M642 too old.
M608 You're joking!
M642 So, he was on eh Ducatis this year, //for//
M608 //un-huh//
M642 Monster Mob. er, and I've I've, it's terrible, I've got a Monster Mob, you know, baseball cap, signed by him.
M608 uh-huh
M642 And he's now going over to Yamaha, for what might be his last season ever. He's won something like eh eight Isle of Man TTs.
M608 Yeah.
M642 And he's a r- nice guy.
M608 mmhm
M642 He really is. See the, see the Formula One guys; they're so precious, //and they've got//
M608 //uh-huh//
M642 their [?]jail[/?] round them; nobody gets near them.
M608 mmhm
M642 The motorcycle boys - you can go up and chin-wag with them. //You can talk//
M608 //mmhm and it//
M642 away.
M608 I mean I know nothing about Stevie Hislop; is he local?
M642 eh not Dumfries. //erm//
M608 //[inaudible]//
F643 Dalbeattie.
M642 Dalbeattie. //Yeah.//
F643 //mmhm//
M608 //mmhm// mm
M642 Yep.
F643 Where did that come from? I must have retained that from one of your diatribes before. [laugh] //[laugh]//
M642 //Aye.// //But they're great guys.//
M608 //Aye, [inaudible]//
M642 As I say, he's had a broken neck and eh they live right at the edge of life.
M608 Yeah.
M642 And erm, and yet, if you want to have a wee blether with him,
M608 mmhm
M642 they'll chin-wag away. //I've got//
M608 //mmhm//
M642 Jim Moodie's photograph upstairs, and autograph in a book. And Jim Moodie won the Isle of Man er TT about six times. //And//
M608 //mmhm//
M642 er, one of Norry Limburn's riders.
F643 mmhm
M642 And again another superb guy. Ian Simpson, another guy whose autograph I've got, met at rugby club, again one of Norry's boys. And erm, he shattered a leg,
M608 mm
M642 about six years ago, made a comeback, and he won the Isle of Man senior TT, on Honda's fiftieth anniversary, for Honda.
M608 mmhm
M642 And he was God for Honda. The next year, he had about two races, he broke his leg again, and remember we were at the club, //and I was//
F643 //Aye, uh-huh//
M642 askin about him. And again a lovely guy, Ian Simpson, Jim Moodie's a Glasgow guy, Ian Simpson's from about Dalbeattie way as well. And, er, fractured bone fragments got into his blood-system.
M608 ouch aye.
M642 And, remember he said, //I mean//
F643 //[cough]//
M642 it was terrible. He was on traction, with a shattered, the second l- time the leg had been shattered, and eh it was about a fortnight before they could operate on it, to try and recover //the leg.//
M608 //mm//
M642 And it was touch and go whether it would be amputated.
M608 oh really.
M642 And also, they were shitting themselves; the debris would travel up //in his blood-system//
M608 //[inaudible]//
F643 mmhm
M642 And //cause a major blockage and and//
M608 //[inaudible] uh-huh//
M642 kill him. And he came through that, and managed to live through it, and, er mind you I've never heard from Norry what he's doing now,
M608 mmhm
M642 but I think Honda gave him a big payoff.
M608 hm
M642 A lot of money.
M608 mmhm
M642 But, I mean it's what these guys do.
M608 Yeah. Have you ever raced, yourself, or is it //you're just interested in the bikes?//
M642 //No, no.// I just ride on a bike, and I I love it and I scare myself at the same time.
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
F643 And what's the //different bikes//
M642 //[inaudible]//
F643 you got again; I cannae remember what they all are.
M642 I've got, I had, I started off, a- eh, about fifteen years ago, my mate Peter and I got back into classic, old bikes.
M608 mmhm
M642 And, eh, he arrived at the door with a Tiger Cub from about nineteen sixty-three. And I went "ye bugger, we've talked about this for so long". And I knew that a neighbour out in Prestwick has a 500cc BSA. And I went back and he still had it and I bought it off him, and restored it.
M608 mmhm When was this?
M642 eh [exhale], twelve, thirteen years //ago.//
M608 //mmhm//
M642 And we set up the Ayr Classic Motorcycle Club. //And then//
M608 //oh right.//
M642 we started the Ayr Classic, the Scottish Classic Bike Show. And this still goes on, and I organise it; I was organising secretary for about six years.
M608 mmhm
M642 And we we had probably about a hundred and twenty, or so entrants, who came from as far afield as middle Ireland, middle England,
M608 mmhm
M642 right up to Aberdeen, and we had it in [?]Dampark Hall[/?].
M608 Okay.
M642 And, it was a great show, //it was really really good,//
M608 //mm//
M642 great fun, and being there at the start and organisin //and settin it up,//
M608 //Yeah.//
M642 Excellent. And, er, I bought two or three more bikes; Peter did the same. And I ended up with five classic bikes. I had a a nineteen fifty-two Matchless, I had a nineteen fifty-eight BSA, which was the first one, I had a nineteen f-f-f- fifty-nine Triumph T21,
M608 mmhm
M642 350 s- twin, I had a nineteen sixty-eight Triumph Tiger 100 SS 500 twin,
M608 mmhm
M642 I had a nineteen seventy-eight Triumph Bonneville 750. [inhale] And, eh, Peter had a mass of bikes as well, when he he got, he, oh, for various reasons, eh, marriage split, divorce, went down to [CENSORED: placename], //he//
M608 //mm//
M642 got rid of some stuff, and all the rest of it. I'd to cut to the chase, now I, I sold off st- some stuff and what I've got not is, I've still got the old BSA, the fifty-eight BSA, I've got the sixty-seven, sixty-eight, Triumph Tiger 100, //And I've//
M608 //mmhm//
M642 still got the Bonneville.
F643 mmhm
M642 //[inaudible] Bonneville.//
M608 //[inaudible] bikes?//
F643 Right, //uh-huh//
M642 //And I// sold the //I sold//
M608 //oh aye.//
M642 the T21 and the Matchless, which was a rust-bucket needing restored. And eh, I bought a Honda Deauville. //Two-bit shaft drive, it's like a Rolls Roy-, aye.//
F643 //It's like driving around in an armchair; it's unbelievable.//
M642 But the poor man's Rolls Royce, eh, it's a 650, V-twin, shaft-drive, electric start,
F643 You're talking in tongues now.
M642 Yeah, gorgeous.
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //erm, I I I// I'm impressed with //[?]your understanding.[/?]//
F643 //It's red and shiny.// //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
M642 Put it like this; at the start of the summer holidays last year, I went through to Knockhill,
M608 mm
M642 on the Friday afternoon, I got there, spent an hour and a half there, I got back on the bike, I was at South Queensferry, and an hour and twenty minutes later, I was back in Ayr, I parked the bike, got my football kit, went out to the Old Racecourse Hotel, and the staff-punters eh football match was on and I played half an hour.
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
M642 //And then we'd a barbie, and there we'd a//
F643 //And then you fell down, [laugh]//
M642 barbecue. //Now,//
M608 //So,//
M642 on the Bonneville, I could never have done that.
M608 mm
F643 The Bonneville was the first one I ever went out //on.//
M642 //It's a// a lovely bike, and the sound, //oh what's the sound like?//
F643 //oh it's got an, oh it's like a roar.// //mmhm//
M642 //eh//
F643 Cause I'd never been on a motorbike before, and I was absolutely terrified at the thought of it, and, erm, you know, [CENSORED: forename] was determined I was going to get over this fear. And he said, "oh I'll just take you round the block", and the block ended up being, you know, a ten-mile //stretch: [laugh] Coylton and everything//
M642 //Coylton and round about//
F643 But I, it was once I got on the thing, I couldn't believe it, it was, like, fantastic feeling.
M608 uh-huh
F643 erm, the pr-, the problem is the Bonneville's very b- bumpy. //So it//
M608 //mm//
F643 rattles all up your spine and everything, but the the Deauville, the the pillion pass-, passenger sits above the driver and you get an awful lot of backdraft.
M608 Right.
F643 So if you've actually got, at the time I had quite a bad neck, it really,
M642 And you remember we hit that //big eh hole on Racecourse, eh, Road.//
F643 //[inaudible] oh, we hit a bump, oh, the bump// It does rea- readjust your spinal column, //kind of bump.//
M608 //oh right.//
F643 Cause you go over it, and it mm [laugh]. //[laugh]//
M608 //But you used to go up to// Knockhill?
M642 oh aye.
M608 Aye, and would you drive round the circuit there?
F643 No, //no no, just,//
M642 //oh no, no no, I'm// //too old for that nonsense,//
M608 //oh right.//
M642 no, no, no.
F643 he just, aye.
M642 But I I, eh John [CENSORED: surname] and I, my two outings a year, my main outings are, though I'd love to go abroad,
M608 mmhm
M642 erm, it is er, over to the North West at Portrush.
M608 mmhm
M642 And what they have there is, erm it's like a ten-mile triangular circuit, between Portrush, Portstewart and Port-, and eh, eh, Carrick, ca-ca-ca, Portrush, Portstewart and
F643 Carrick something? No.
M642 It's not [?]Carrickfers[/?] Anyway, it's a triangular route,
M608 mmhm
M642 and they can get up to, the racers get up to about a hundred and seventy mile an hour in the streets.
F643 And it's just normal roads that are kind of //abandoned.//
M642 //Aye,// //yeah, and they shut//
M608 //oh right, right.//
M642 the roads, f-f-f- for the day. And, aw, what was I like? //I'd my mobile on me; I phoned//
F643 //Aye [inaudible] God he phoned me, he phoned me.//
M642 Louise, //We had, what we//
F643 //Listen to this!// //Vroom! [laugh]//
M642 //did,//
M608 //[laugh]//
M642 //what we did//
F643 //[laugh]//
M642 was, this year,
F643 [laugh]
M642 we got there, and, within that big triangle, there's little country lanes. And we were told by one of the old stewards, "take your bike in there, and move about in the course of the day on your bike, and get to different points in the circuit". [inhale] And so we thought, "we'll do it this year", and it was drizzly, yucky day. But anyway, we went in and we set the bike doon, and we went on to the coast area, which is the top of the triangle, the top flat. As I say, there's Portrush, Portstewart, and then, Coleraine!
F643 oh Coleraine, uh-huh
M642 Down here, the bottom of the triangle. And, eh, these guys were going round, and they've got a helicopter which goes round filming, because, and they've got film crews all round, cause this is crazy, I could show you two years ago the video footage. And this is scary stuff, I say a hundred and seventy mile an hour, on, basically, the road to er Minishant. //Yeah.//
M608 //Yeah.//
M642 Except, it's no as straight as that.
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
M642 //And, er,//
F643 //[laugh]//
M642 you know they're doing all this stuff. And eh, we're moving around within this. And eh, comin out, in the afternoon it dried out a bit. And we had gone up the road, and we had, erm, across the road at the outskirts of eh Portstewart, there was a wee mini-market. And we went across and we got some beers to take back to our hotel. And a couple of bits and pieces. So, we thought, we haven't had anything to drink, and we've got our bikes in here, we will have a can of beer. So we're behind this, look upon it like this, I am standing here leaning on the fencepost of a field.
M608 mmhm
M642 And here the pavement starts.
M608 mmhm
M642 And where the end of the the room is,
M608 mm
M642 is where the pavement stops, and beyond that are the motorbikes,
F641 [cough]
M642 and they're comin up, and they're goin th-, come up, uphill, round a wee chicane of a roundabout, and they're accelerating. And they're going by us about a hundred and thirty miles an hour, [inhale] which is where the fire is. //[inaudible]//
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 Did you go deaf?
F643 That was incredibly loud.
M642 The helicopters are going round filming for the video of the north west, for the [?]year[/?]. And so it's like a finger pointing from the sky, in the triangle. You know where the leading //riders are,//
M608 //Of course, aye.//
M642 as it's going round. So you're waiting for them coming. So I'd dialled up on the mobile, and I got Louise on the //mobile, and I'm saying//
M608 //[laugh]//
M642 "It's great, the sun's just come out, it's nice and dry, it's absolutely lovely, and, by the way, the bikes are just coming by, hang on a minute, and you'll get an idea of why //I'm here",//
F643 //[laugh]// //[laugh]//
M642 //And I reached out// over the fence, which was to about here, and therefore //we're only//
F643 //[laugh]//
M642 six or seven feet away from the bikes going by.
M608 [laugh]
M642 //And the noise was just//
F643 //[inaudible] jumped out of my skin; it was incredible. [laugh]// //[laugh]//
M642 //as these// things, they're accelerating up that hill, and they're going by us about a hundred and thirty miles an hour, and as they're going along the straight before the next bend, they're up to about a hundred and sixty.
F643 hm
M642 And it's just, they're aff their heids!
M608 [laugh]
M642 //[?]there[/?]//
F643 //[laugh]//
M642 Is that an Ayrshire //expression? But they are//
M608 //That is an ish-, an Ayrshire expression.//
M642 totally aff their heids.
F643 [laugh]
M642 They are guys who have lost the plot. [inhale] And the number of people who get killed, it's amazing.
F643 Yeah. Probably passers-by at that speed as well.
M642 when-, where we were, when I I put the phone out for Louise, it runs down and then there's a wee kick, that way [gesture].
M608 mmhm
M642 And there's a a a road come out, and we were standing there watching these bikes comin down, and go round, and you thought it was pretty straight,
M608 mmhm
M642 but when we were up there, it was a big bend, you know they just went round it, and there were a couple of guys standing there, said "you should have been here seven years ago", [inhale] what happened was, a guy came down, and there's a kerb on the far side, and they're trying to get as close to it as they can,
M608 mmhm
M642 to shallow out the corner. And he got in so tight, the wheel kicked //up on//
F643 //[click]//
M642 to the kerbing,
F643 oh my God, that's terrible.
M642 And what happened was this: as he came round and the wheel went onto the kerbing, he come out the saddle. And he lost his grip with his right hand.
M608 Dear God.
M642 And he was holding onto the the handlebar with his left - he did Superman!
M608 //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]// //[laugh]//
M642 //And he went along// And
M608 No!
M642 the wheel ran along the kerb, and the bike was at like forty-five degrees,
F643 mmhm
M642 and he's like this, and he's doin about a hundred and forty miles an hour.
F643 [inaudible]
M642 //And, what happened,//
M608 //You'll believe a man can fly! [laugh]//
M642 was //the//
F643 //[inaudible]//
M642 bike came down off it, and got vertical again, and jumped him up, and he ended up back in the saddle of the bike. //And he caught on again, and lived, and went on.//
F643 //oh that's got to be a legend, [laugh] the legend of the flying motorcyclist, [laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]//
F643 [inhale]
M642 And that's seemingly what was ha- //No, no, no, th-, the two the they//
F643 //Och ye, away, it was a couple of old Irish guys tellin you porkies! [laugh]//
M642 they named the guy. //And they said, they just, you you honestly wouldn't//
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh] well, that's true then! [laugh]//
M642 have believed that. //that, and the roundabout [inaudible]//
F643 //[laugh] who's now dead, so cannot provide [inaudible] evidence.// //[laugh]//
M642 //Now,//
M608 Were you saying this happened more than once, or was this one //guy?//
M642 //oh no.// this was just this one //guy, and this again,//
F643 //[laugh]//
M642 Jim Moodie again, see the guy, I've got his //pictures//
M608 //mmhm//
M642 and autographs upstairs, Jim, last year, was riding round, and he came off at a roundabout, somewhere out on the course. And, eh, he was in second place at the time, and they've got a tannoy,
M608 mmhm
M642 all the way round, givin you an update on what's goin on. [inhale] And, we all, all we heard was this patter, "eh right, so and so and so and so, Jim Moodie's not up there in the front, eh, what's happened to him, we don't know, we'll let you know, and eh he's come off at such and such roundabout." erm, right, we'll we'll let you know what's happened, erm, and a couple of minutes later it was, "He's okay, erm, what's happened is, er, he just tops- er top-sided, but very gently, and, er, he came off, and he's now sitting with the spectators, and one of them's loaned him his mobile phone, he's phoned his wife back in the pits to say he's okay, and someone else has given him a cigarette."
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
M642 That's not Grand Prix.
M608 //[laugh] No, it's not.//
F641 //[laugh]// //[laugh]//
M642 //Yeah, but that's, that was the patter, Jim's okay,//
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
M642 he's I //suspect he was given the mobile to let the wife know he's okay, and//
F643 //having a fag and a chat with his missus [laugh]//
M642 someone else has gien him a fag, so, forget it. And that's, that is still racing at the cutting //edge, that's//
M608 //Aye, aye.//
M642 //That, that's amazin.//
F643 //Aye, but I mean,// one, one of the things you you often see is when the the guys come back, cause they quite often now get the the ferry to Troon, and the the it's when the the the //door opens on the ferry, and there was just like whoa, Hell's Angels appear! [laugh]//
M642 //[inhale] [click], a hundred.// A hundred and fifty bikes,
M608 Aye.
M642 down in the shell, a metal shell, of the //of the car//
M608 //[?]I bet[/?]//
M642 deck, and everybody opens up.
F643 [laugh]
M642 Everybody starts up their bikes. //And oh dear and every year,//
F643 //The people at the back [laugh], suffocating I would imagine!//
M642 there's all these people, are lined up on the er, you know, the jetty,
M608 uh-huh
M642 to see all these bikes comin off.
F643 [laugh]
M642 And really, I'll tell you, a buzz,
M608 Yeah.
M642 I mean, my bike it's a woose, it's got no, it's just a a shaft-drive cruisin bike: the Bonny was good. //oh, you ripped it,//
F643 //oh, it was good, [inaudible]//
M642 and it's it it's like //it's like//
F643 //[cough]//
M642 Bugatis, But, eh, last year when I went over on the the Deauville, oh and by the way, terrible
M608 [laugh]
M642 when we landed in Dublin, eh sorry, eh //Belfast,//
F643 //Docked?// //Docked?//
M608 //Right.//
M642 in Belfast,
F643 You landed?
M642 erm
F643 Did you fly?
M642 We landed in the ferry,
F643 //Okay.//
M608 //Okay.//
M642 on the quay, //[inaudible] that's//
F643 //[laugh]//
M642 us landing.
F643 //Thought I'd missed something somewhere.//
M608 //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]//
M642 Aye. We landed with the bikes, and you've got a high ramp; at eh Troon, it's low stuff.
M608 mmhmm
M642 At Belfast you've got to climb up and out.
M608 oh right.
M642 I stalled on //the way down.//
F643 //aw!//
M608 //oh no!// //[laugh]//
F643 //[laugh] Make you look like a wee old fart,// //[inaudible] [laugh]//
M642 //I'm going up like//
M608 //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]// //[laugh]//
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
M642 stall half-way up the f-fu- //because, what's happenin there's you've got about//
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]//
M642 five rows //of bikers coming, you know, one, two, three, four, five,//
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
M642 and everybody's trying to get their wee space to go up.
M608 Aye.
M642 //And you're you're feathering the clutch, and that and you're goin//
F643 //[laugh]//
M642 [makes noise of clutch] and then I got my turn, and as I started to open, it went 'Dunk'!
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]//
M642 There's a hundred bikers //behind me, and//
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
M642 guess what they're saying.
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
M642 Stupid old //bastard should not be bikin at his//
M608 //[laugh]// //[laugh]//
M642 //age.//
F643 //No!// //[inaudible] [laugh]//
M642 //And they went [makes noise of motorbikes revving] and,//
M608 //[laugh]//
M642 luckily,
F643 Menopausal //man on a bike.//
M642 //And we're on, I'm// //on a slope and a//
M608 //[laugh]//
M642 ramp like that,
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //huh aye.//
M642 I don't want to start roll back
M608 oh God, //no.//
M642 //Don't want to// start ro-, credibility is like, you know, [expels air through teeth]
F643 But that was, I mean, what about that other time, the erm the Old Bridge incident [laugh]?
M642 aw //Here's another one, on the Bonneville,//
F643 //This was, [laugh]// //This is why,//
M642 //Down at//
F643 this is why when you get be another ten or twelve years older, John, do not get a desire for a motorbike. //[laugh]//
M642 //Bikes are awfa heavy,//
F641 //[laugh]//
M642 //the the Deauville,//
M608 //No, I I need stabilisers.//
M642 the Deauville is two hundred and twenty kilos. //Dead weight.//
F643 //I don't know what that means in pounds; what does that mean in pounds?//
M642 Can I swear? Fuckin heavy. //Aye. Two hundred and twenty kilos,//
F643 //Right, okay, for a wee fellow like yoursel, [inaudible] kilos.//
M608 //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]//
M642 is about four hundred and fifty //pounds.//
F643 //Ouch.// //That's heavy, uh-huh.//
F641 //Yeah.//
M642 Right. So, when you're movin, no problem.
F643 mmhm
M642 When you're trying to put it up on a stand, down off a stand, move away slowly,
F643 It's too big for you. //[laugh]//
M642 //They're all too big for me, and then I die, then I die, I don't care, I don't care.//
M608 //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]//
M642 They can all be too //big for me, I'd, no I'd, aye exactly, a moped.//
F643 //You need a wee bike, [laugh]// //[laugh]//
M642 //So, anyway,//
F641 //[laugh]//
F643 [exhale]
M642 What was the stor-? //oh the the bridge,//
F643 //oh aye the br- bridge// //incident.//
M642 //the//
M608 //The bridge.//
M642 Bonneville is only maybe,
F643 [laugh]
M642 about, oh, thirty or forty pounds lighter. So, I've been out with John [CENSORED: surname], we go on a a run away up round Straiton, Nick of the Balloch, down towards Barr.
M608 mmhm
M642 And when you get into Barr, you've got the wee road along the burn, and then you've got a a wee hump-back bridge over the burn,
M608 mmhm
M642 to carry on towards Girvan. So, we're riding along, very cool, dude, cruisin along, he's got his BMW. He does a lot of all-year miles; I don't. So he's very relaxed on his bike. We're travelling along, beside the burn, before making a left over the the hump-back bridge. I notice Liz [CENSORED: surname], her husband, sitting at a picnic bench,
F643 [laugh]
M642 in the middle of the, the village, beside the burn,
M608 As you do.
M642 and their kids are obviously playing about in the burn, middle of summer. So, we're going by, and I go, "Hey, there they are", so I go 'Toot toot' on my horn, wave, And, we then go on to the hump-back bridge. So, I give another wave as I'm going over //the bridge.//
M608 //[laugh]//
M642 John's gone ahead of me. And I've slowed down, because I'm thinking, "might go back and have a a wee hello",
M608 mmhm
M642 talk with them, [inhale]. Now, I'm up there and I'm just on the top, and I wave, and I'm down to no revs. The bike stalls. So you think, the bridge parapet, you okay with that? //The, the [inaudible]//
F643 //mmhm sure.//
M642 Is that high: I'm there on the bike. I am waving like this, with one hand still on the throttle. Really r- low revs going over the hump. I g- open the throttle again, and the bike dies on me.
M608 mm
M642 Right?
M608 mmhm
M642 Suddenly I'm //going this way//
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //oh no.// //[laugh]//
F643 //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]//
M642 The parapet is there; I am waving to my friends, //I disappear [laugh] below the front.//
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
F641 //I- disappear [laugh]// //[laugh]//
M642 //[laugh]//
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
M642 //[laugh]//
F643 //You're not exactly Mr Cool on a bike.// //[laugh]//
M642 //oh no.//
M608 //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]//
F643 oh I don't know.
M642 I did the same last year. Now the Deauville, lovely bike. And, we had gone from eh, Keswick, onto the motorway, down about thirty miles, in atrocious weather.
M608 mmhm
M642 Pissing rain, galeforce wind. This is not biking that I want to do. And then we take a left, cause we're going down south, into North Yorkshire.
M608 mmhm
M642 [inhale] And we then have a lovely afternoon, The rain stops, still cloudy, but we're on beautiful roads, and we go all over the place. And we're goin up this valley, and at one point Peter's ahead of me; he's got a VFR Honda, which is like a sports roadster, and it can do about a hundred and fifty miles an hour; my //machine//
M608 //mm//
M642 can only do about a hundred and twenty. //And eh, he's//
F643 //Not that you should be doing that anyway.//
M642 No, no we don't do that; Peter never gets near that either. But it's the VFR I've been on it; lovely bike. But you're like a jockey on it.
M608 mmhm
M642 And that's no use for me with my back: I want to be //a bit more relaxed.//
F643 //In an armchair?// //[laugh] [inaudible] armchair [laugh]//
M642 //In my armchair. So we're going along, and at one point, you know, and we signalled.// back and forwards, and he's in front of me, and I see him, his legs comin up, //and that and I'm goin//
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
M642 Well, you do that, see when you're on a bike for a while. //erm, you don't know this.//
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]// [inaudible] //[laugh]//
M642 //But, what you do is,//
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //Actually, Augusta does.//
F641 I do.
M642 You actually //ride? Right.//
M608 //She's the biker in the family.//
M642 You you'll shake //legs, you know,//
F641 //You do, yeah, uh-huh//
M642 that kind of stuff. And so Peter does this.
F641 [?]okay[/?], erm
M642 And I'm goin, aw, why?
M608 Thanks.
M642 Then the next thing.
F641 Do you want [inaudible]
M642 I'm up out the saddle. //There was a wee hump on the road,//
F643 //[laugh]// uh-huh
M642 and I'm up out the thing, and, I went, well, he actually, his lighter bike went right up so high, that it increased revs. You know the revs increase,
M608 uh-huh
M642 because the total bike was off the deck. All that happened with me was, I came up off my bike because it's a heavier bike. And I started laughing //[inaudible] helmet, it was aw it was//
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]//
M642 cause I didn't realise, it, it was like being on a, you know, a rollercoaster,
M608 //uh-huh//
F641 //mmhm//
M642 and not expectin it. And I was right out the saddle, and I was only holdin on. And, er, okay, and so we're going round like this, and it was it was absolutely tremendous.
F643 [laugh]
M642 //er//
F641 //[laugh]//
M642 doin this run. Well, we came back, through very rainy weather again into the Lake District, and I went round the side of this lake. And, the lake's down here, the hillside's comin down, lot of water on the road. And Peter said, "You go ahead", and I'm going back and forwards, up down, round about, And I'm going "I'm not used to wet roads", and, in actual fact, I've never done this before, I t- went over at one point on a bend, in wet, and I scuffed the outside of my boot,
F643 //mmhm//
M608 //mmhm//
M642 as I went over. I'm too old for that, I //I'm not interested in that.//
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //mm//
M642 And, [exhale] //and//
M608 //mm//
M642 we had a great time, Hundred and fifty mile run. Came back into Keswick, outskirts of Keswick, petrol station, filled up, hundred yards down the road, turned off the main road left, and our bed and breakfast hotel was in the wee back street.
M608 Right.
M642 And what we had to do was, we went along th- this first back street and came to a crossroads, and our hotel was up on the right. So Peter's in front of me, and we're just 'chug chug chug', full tank of petrol, end of the day, psycho stuff. I've been out the saddle, I have scuffed my boots,
M608 mmhm
M642 I've, I'd been in rain, heavy winds, all the rest of it, and we're back in this lovely calm. And, in the garage when we topped up, there was this big Harley club. There was about thirty bikes or so, and they said they'd gone further north than us, and it had just rained solid,
M608 mm
M642 been total crap, and we went, "we've been lucky, we've been in the right place". So, Peter comes to this junction, does a loop right left, nothing around, cars parked everywhere in the wee back street, makes the right turn. [CENSORED: forename]'s behind him, stands up on the footpegs, to look over the parked cars, stands up, like this, you know, his arm up there, and I'm goin, "nothin, nothin, nothin", turn, open the throttle,
F643 [laugh]
M642 and the bike stalls.
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]//
M642 Chug, chug, chug, dunk!
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]//
M642 And I'm up here.
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]// //[laugh]//
F643 //What, on your tiptoes on the pedal?//
M608 //[laugh]//
M642 And for a moment, I'm standing on the the footpegs,
F643 //[laugh]//
F641 //[inaudible]//
M642 //I now//
M608 //[inaudible]//
M642 go, 'RRRRR //RRRR'//
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]//
M642 And I put my foot down. Now there's that between //the//
F643 //uh-huh//
M642 ground and the footpeg, So I'm waiting to hit the ground. And I do. And I've got, you know, two hundred kilos //of bike plus a//
M608 //Of bike, aye,//
M642 a full load of petrol, //cause I've just filled up,//
F643 //oh right.//
M608 //[inaudible] aye.//
F641 //Plus yourself.//
M642 and my leg's goin //er, er, er,//
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]//
M642 No, //and I just//
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]//
M642 keep goin and goin an goin. And down I went, clunk! And there's a a //lassie walking [inaudible]//
F643 //[?]in[/?], he d- he disnae learn.//
M608 //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]//
M642 There's a lassie walkin along the road, one of the locals. And I'm down //'Daaaa', here,//
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]// //[laugh]//
M642 //"Hello, dear, how are you?"//
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
M642 And erm, she said "Are you alright?" //Yes, I'm alright.//
M608 //[laugh]//
M642 And //eh, so I//
F643 //[?]so it it in[/?]//
M642 get to the bike, and it's now totally full of petrol and the breather, the br- wee breather, eh, tube,
M608 mmhm
M642 is leaking petrol because it's //got//
F641 //Too full.//
M642 four and a half, five gallons of petrol in the tank,
M608 mm
M642 and of course you're just seein this swim of petrol //over the//
M608 //Yeah.//
M642 load the road. And I went, oh no no no no. And, so I'm trying to lift the bike up and I can't; it's just too bloody heavy.
M608 Aye.
M642 And this girl's goin, "are you sure you're alright?", and I'm goin, "oh
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
M642 fuck off! //Fuck off! Or help me//
M608 //[laugh]//
M642 lift the bike up! er, but luckily Peter had happened just to kind of //I don't//
M608 //[?]look round[/?]//
M642 know, he just kind of looked back in his mirror and he saw me goin down. So he came back and the two of us, now there there there must have been no more than a quarter of a pint of petrol come out the bike, and the bike has plastic outriggers, and //behind//
F641 //mmhm//
M642 outriggers are like inch steel
F641 mmhm
M642 rods, //that//
M608 //mmhm//
M642 they come out like that and then look back,
M608 //mmhm//
F641 //mmhm//
M642 so it's just like a couple of flippers,
M608 //Yeah.//
F641 //mmhm//
M642 and the bike just went 'dunk' and sat.
M608 //Yeah.//
F641 //mmhm//
M642 And the only damage is a couple of scrapes on these plastic outriggers,
M608 mmhm
M642 which cost about twelve quid.
F643 //mmhm//
F641 //mmhm//
M608 Yeah.
M642 And, it's okay, I'll maybe renew //eventually,//
M608 //mmhm//
M642 But, oh, embarrassment!
F641 [laugh] //[inaudible]//
F643 //But you do that on a regular basis.//
F641 Priceless.
M608 Priceless, yes,
M642 //What? What?//
F641 //I bet [inaudible] the price.//
F643 You give it a n- a wee, you go out there, and that, and then you wonder why I'm kind of nervous about coming out with you, you cannae even lift the blooming thing up.
M642 The only //I//
F643 //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]//
M642 have, right hold on, I'll tell you, I have had
F643 No, don't touch wood, don't tell me about anything to do //with accidents,//
M642 //No.//
F643 that's bad karma.
M642 One in Ireland, again it was from a standing stop. //Trying to make//
F643 //So what [?]I hide is[/?]//
M642 a turn, on a bad bit of road, And I was, I was from stationary, going to move away and there was a car coming and I stopped, and I put my foot down and there was a bloody pot-hole.
F643 //Ach!//
M608 //Right.//
F643 Right, okay. //[laugh]//
M642 //No miles an hour.//
F641 //[laugh]//
M642 That's the one. There was another one at [?]Kilkirn[/?], That's two.
F643 uh-huh
M642 And again that was on the upslope,
F643 Right.
M642 on a wee quiet country road, tryin to make a right turn.
F643 uh-huh, uh-huh.
M642 Right, and the third time is the one I'm tellin you about.
F643 Right.
M642 And that's in about, of the modern bikes, the last five years, and that's in five years, that's three times, and it's all been from stationary.
F643 Right, okay sir! //I won't, I won't be terrified then.//
M642 //Totally stationary.// There is absolutely no problem when moving.
F643 uh-huh
M642 //It's just a [inaudible]//
M608 //Apart from the scuffing, apart from the scuffing of the boot.//
F641 //So the trick is?//
M642 oh aye, that //was seriously, that was,//
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]// //Right, [laugh]//
M642 //Aye, that was great biking, no that was, that was,// I went oh //I'm not supposed to do//
F643 //[CENSORED: forename], you're somebody// I mean that, er [CENSORED: forename] does like this kind of mental motorcycling stuff, and then he does, speed, speed, speed, and then he does skiing. Cause you do all this demented skiing stuff as well though, it's //quite scary as well.//
M608 //You're an ex- you an// extreme sportsman.
F643 uh-huh
M642 Yeah, I'm just past my sell-by date. //[inaudible]//
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
M642 Yeah, I like, I like eh the notion of, the thing, the th- the only, the thing I like about skiing is, normally, if I've gonna have a tomba - that's an expression we use -
F643 A tomba?
M608 Which means?
F643 A tumble?
M642 What, you don't know about Tomba? He was the French ski champion.
F643 Okay.
M642 Except we call a tomba, it's a a fall doon.
F643 oh right, a fall //doon?//
M642 //Aye, it's just// //okay,//
M608 //mm//
M642 it's just silly stuff. But, aye, if I have a tomba, it's because I'm responsible for me. Whereas on the bike, there are other circumstances //that//
F643 //mmhm//
M642 //could eh//
M608 //mm//
M642 erm, prevail, which is other people.
M608 Yeah.
F643 Aye, mmhm
M642 erm, I don't have a problem about me on my bike. I'm always looking to cars, //and other stuff around me,//
F643 //uh-huh//
M608 //mm//
M642 whereas normally on the ski-slope it's me being psycho, and if I've a fall, it's me to blame.
M608 mm
M642 So it's easier, skiing's easier.
M608 mm
M642 oh but I love, I love the, aye I love it.
F643 //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]//
M608 What age did you start skiing?
M642 I was at Jordanhill. I did three or four years. Then I gave it all up, just for my rugby. //Then I went//
M608 //mm//
M642 back it about, what, ten years ago?
F643 mmhm mmhm
M608 Did you start in Scotland; was it Aviemore //and places like that, aye?//
M642 //oh aye, aye.//
M608 Was it dry-ski sloping, or
M642 er, no, we went to Jor-, eh through Jordanhill we went to Aviemore in the second year.
M608 mmhm
M642 And some of the guys in our year hated it, and I loved it.
M608 mmhm
M642 And then I went to Glenmore Lodge as a teacher with kids from [CENSORED: placename]. And, erm, carried it on as I say for three or four years, once I qualified. And then because of my rugby commitment, never went back to it.
M608 mm
M642 But, oh, skiing is, I c-, I could have I could have been good. I could have been, eh, you know, I reckon, a pretty good, reasonable, high-level [inaudible] instructor. I made a [exhale] I made a bad choice, but it was a great choice. I've got a lot of friends through rugby. eh //Yeah.//
F643 //You've got a lot of erm// I don't know. //Joiners and plumbers and electricians, [laugh] and,//
M642 //[inaudible] aye [inaudible]// //contacts, friends, I've had some great social//
F643 //[laugh]//
M642 times through //rugby,//
M608 //mmhm//
M642 But, I got so involved in my rugby that eh the skiing didn't have a place.
M608 mm
M642 And I only came back to it really after I I gave up rugby and marathon running and all that nonsense.
M608 Yeah, you did marathon running as well?
M642 Yeah.
M608 Do the Glasgow marathon?
M642 Yep. I've got the video if you wanna //watch it.//
F643 //No,// we don't want to watch it. [laugh] I'm sorry to be so //oh horrified, but I have watched//
M642 //Jimmy Saville, yeah.//
F643 erm a video of a marathon before and it's just, snooze material. //[laugh]//
M642 //Somewhere in the archive material, I've// got, I've got video of from when I actually did the national television stuff.
M608 mmhm
M642 And, eh, there's me and Jimmy Saville running breast to breast.
M608 Aye, that must be kind of interesting. //That was before,//
M642 //I hated//
M608 that was before Louis Theroux?
M642 I hated I hated Jimmy Saville because
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
M642 everybody everybody //it was//
M608 //[laugh]// //[laugh]//
M642 //was it the second time I did it?//
F643 //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]//
M642 Everybody shouting, "Come on Jimmy, come on Jimmy", and I'm going, "Fuck Jimmy, what about [CENSORED: forename]?" //"Gie [CENSORED: forename] a shout!"//
F643 //[laugh]// //[laugh]//
M642 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]//
M642 "Who gives a shit about Jimmy?" //I'm your local hero.//
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]//
M642 And eh, he used to have minders that actually picked up his water for him at the water stations. He never even actually had to deviate off his course to go and get his water bottle.
M608 That's shocking.
M642 Yeah.
M608 I don't think the public knows that. //[laugh]//
M642 //I mean, I have, I. Listen! I have it on video.//
F643 //[laugh] They do now!//
M608 [snort] [laugh]
M642 I finished ahead of him, but //the media boys//
F643 //Did you really?//
M642 Aye, I did, och, give him his due, at his age, he, you know, he did, he's done about fifty or sixty //marathons.//
F643 //mmhm//
M642 He done a hell of a lot of them.
M608 mm
M642 But, we came into the final shoot, and it was Scotts' porage oats were the //eh, the big sponsors.//
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //sponsors?//
M642 So, they suddenly pushed this porridge in front of Jimmy, //as he came in,//
M608 //[laugh]//
M642 //Right? And there I am, and they they//
F643 //oh, no, just what you don't want at the back of your picture. [laugh]//
M642 pulled him through the other gate, and he appeared in front of me. and somewhere around this house, there's a video, and there's [CENSORED: forename] [CENSORED: surname], behind Jimmy Saville, puttin on a face like //Scott's fuckin Porage, you know, at a marathon, who are you kiddin?//
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]// //[laugh]//
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
M642 And there's this look in my face, totally aghast. And Jimmy's going, of course, because obviously he's getting baksheesh,
F643 uh-huh
M642 goin, "Yeah, ar-ar- //ar".//
M608 //[laugh]//
M642 And I'm goin "fuckin //[inaudible]".//
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
M642 [inaudible] you've never seen that. //But no, it's there somewhere in the archives.//
F643 //I haven't seen that, aye, that'll be a treat for another night oh Lord.//
M642 And it's [CENSORED: forename], behind Jimmy Saville in the the finish-gate, //[?]I am[/?]//
M608 //[laugh]//
M642 oh //no.//
M608 //And this was// shown on national television?
M642 Yeah! oh no, you //don't want to be doin that.//
F643 //I mean, see, the thing is, Joe Public// would just have thought that you were grimacing in the pain of having run twenty-six point whatever it is miles.
M642 Aye. I was grimacing at the thought of tryin to take a spoonful of //Scott's Porage Oats, [laugh] [?]or anything like that[/?]. [laugh]//
F643 //oh I know [laugh]//
M642 So,
F643 mmhm
M642 But, eh, no that was, the marathon running was probably the worst thing I did.
F643 Aye, does it not knacker your knees and your achilles?
M642 Spine.
F643 Spine?
M642 //Spine [inaudible]//
M608 //Did you ever hit the Wall?//
M642 oh aye.
M608 What was that like?
M642 Sair to bear.
F643 [laugh] //[laugh]//
M642 //The energy goes;// it really is
M608 So how do you keep on when you run?
M642 The worst thing that happened was the first year we did it, there was four of us. And I, oh I'm pissed off, and I'm going to have to get the photograph doctored, cause //the guys are really//
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
F643 //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]//
M608 There's something, reality doesn't change if you doctor a photograph.
M642 //No, I'll tell you what happened.//
F643 //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]//
F643 oh it does!
M608 [laugh]
F643 Remember Hitler? //[inaudible]//
M642 //Aye.//
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //There's just no more// //no more frumpy ladies in the photographs, doesn't mean [inaudible]//
M642 //No, I tell you, eh this is how bad// I feel about this.
F643 mm
M642 We ran, and we were the Marine Corps Fitness Club guys, and they took us up
F643 [laugh]
M642 And, //nobody,//
F643 //Fitness and Liar Club!// //[laugh]//
M642 //nobody, nobody had done// marathons before, other than, international athletes. And this was the first Glasgow Marathon. And we went out and we did things like, "Well, let's go for a six-mile run". What's a six-mile run like? And we did it. And then we did a ten-mile, and then we did fifteen-mile. And then we did eighteen mile. And eventually, what we did was,
F643 [laugh]
M642 we changed at the rugby club, //Right?//
M608 //Aye.//
M642 Y-y-y- you'll probably not know the area. We changed at the rugby club, ran out past Alloway Primary to the Maybole Road, ran up to Digital,
M608 mmhm
M642 along to Dalrymple, out the back road Dalrymple to the Straiton Road, up to Maybole, and then back in the Maybole High Road to the rugby club.
M608 hm
M642 And if we felt good, we didn't just go into the rugby club, we went along Long Hill, to Doonfoot, and then along Green Field, back to the rugby club. And one night Peter and I did another lap round the rugby club grounds. Which was //about//
F643 //I take it// you werenae gettin sex //in these days?//
M642 //It was about aye,// //It was about,//
M608 //[laugh]//
M642 //twen- twenty-one miles.//
F643 //[laugh]//
M642 Right? [inhale] So then, the four of us went up to Glasgow, to do the marathon, And, we, we got to about twenty-two, twenty-three miles, and we were knackered. And, we actually, we actually walked for about quarter of a mile. at one point. And then we came into the eh, Glasgow Green area. [inhale] And we ran up this long avenue, and came round a dog leg to the right. and then there was the long straight to the finish, and we st- we jogged along that, and I said to the guys, this is, me, this is what annoys me, I said to the guys, "We started together, we'll finish together". And we had these, what we done was, erm, oh God, John [CENSORED: surname], the New Zealander, was a sub-four minute miler. And there was a a an outfit that were puttin kit out and it was called Sub-Four,
M608 mmhm
F643 mmhm
M642 meaning sub-four
F643 mile. //minute miles.//
M642 //minute mile.//
F643 mmhm
M642 and what we'd done was we'd put our tops out, and it was Sub-Four and then in brackets, HRS.
F643 For what?
M608 Sub-four hours!
F643 Hours! oh right, //[laugh]//
M642 //Right?//
F643 [laugh] God!
M642 So we're comin in just after three an a half hours in a marathon, and we've all got these on. And we're jogging up together up this final two hundred metres. And I I had no idea, nobody else knew where the finish was, but you're standing there as a steward,
F643 mmhm
M642 and there's a finish-gate to the right, there's a finish-gate to the left. As we came up to this, this lassie came towards us, and split us up. And the three went that way, and I went that way.
F643 aw
M642 Now, we went through the gate, I mean, I, just, you're knackered, you're just, you've got no argument in you.
F643 mmhm
M642 You just, kind of, this lassie came towards me with day-glo kit and stuff on, and, the guys went that way and I went that way, and we finished, we went through a twin-gate, cause it was a split gate, //got our//
M608 //mm//
M642 times up, see the next year, second year, the magazine came out, [inhale] and there were one or two wee articles, there were one or two black and white photographs, There was one colour photograph in the middle of that magazine, three guys, //sub-four//
F643 //[laugh]//
M642 hours,
F643 Nae sign of [CENSORED: forename]?
M642 Nope.
F643 You're a sad old sowl, really, //aren't you?//
M608 //You were// following this day-glo lassie?
F643 [laugh] //[laugh]//
M642 //The three of them there.//
F643 [laugh] //[laugh]//
M642 //Sub-Four, HRS.//
M608 Did you feel resentment at, did you feel any resentment about this?
M642 Yeah.
F643 Is this something you've carried with you for a //number of years?//
M642 //Yeah, oh aye.// //But I, I have got to get//
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]//
M642 //an [inaudible]//
M608 //Have you thought about, have you thought about counselling.//
M642 //[inaudible]//
F643 //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]//
M642 //I've got my//
F643 //[laugh]//
M642 photograph, of me going through the gate, with the time above my head, same time. and the guys have got their photographs, and what Peter did was, he got in touch with the magazine, //publishers,//
F643 //uh-huh//
M642 and he got the original photograph,
F643 uh-huh
M642 not just the magazine photograph. He's got the original photograph, and there's Willie and Kenny and him,
F643 mmhm
M642 and I'm no there.
F643 //aw//
M608 //But you could be you// could be put in digitally.
F643 Yes.
M642 //Well, that's that is really something,//
F641 //[laugh]// //[laugh]//
F643 //History could be rewritten.//
M642 No, that is something //[?]I wouldnae do[/?]//
F643 //But how would you nurse// your wrath to keep //it warm in [inaudible]//
M642 //I don't care, I don't get,// I don't care even if I'm just a head and shoulders behind them, You know, I //really//
M608 //mm//
M642 should be in there, I, I was totally pissed off at that, //I was.//
M608 //mm//
M642 And to be in, they've got the commemorative programme from the next year.
F643 //Right.//
M608 //oh right.//
M642 //In total//
F643 //You your claim to// fame was
M608 mm
M642 And it's the only colour photograph in that,
F643 mm The day-glo angel took //you away from it.//
M642 //in that magazine.//
F643 Aye.
M642 And the effort and the energy //that went//
M608 //mm//
M642 in to that, and that is the one
M608 Yeah.
M642 one of two or three things in my life that I feel terrible at.
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //mm// But when you hit //hit, hit but when you, but when you//
F643 //You've had a good life, then, that's all [laugh]//
M608 hit the wall, how do you get through that, cause, if I hit, if I if I was close to hitting a wall, I would sit down, I would stop.
M642 Well you've got to hit the wall and then you'll find out what you're made of.
F643 //What is it?//
M608 //mm//
F643 Some kind of test of mettle?
M642 Your body turns to jelly, honestly.
F643 uh-huh, so it's like me having a palpitation attack?
M642 //It's like, it's [inaudible]//
M608 //It, it's when all the blood-sugar goes, isn't it?//
F643 uh-huh
M642 Yeah. Aye.
F643 oh God. //I get that a lot, [laugh] but I'm just kind of sitting around//
M642 //Aye, [inaudible]//
F643 the house, [laugh] //[laugh]//
M642 //It's like// with sex the second time.
F643 //eh?//
M608 //Can't be that good.//
F643 [laugh] //[laugh]//
M642 //No, it's//
F641 //[laugh]// //[laugh]//
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //I'd be I'd be running marathons.// //[laugh]//
M642 //No, no no.//
F643 //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]//
M642 //No, what I mean is, you may f-f-f- fancy your chances at trying a second, but the body's saying nae chance.//
F643 //[laugh]// //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]// //[laugh]//
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //oh I see.//
M642 If you kind of get the drift, it's like erm You know. The mind says "aye", but the body //says//
F643 //[laugh]//
M642 "nae chance"! //It's//
F643 //[laugh]//
M642 and just trying to
M608 But you carry on?
M642 Well, yeah, you do.
M608 But I mean, at what point does that happen to you; is it close to the end, or?
M642 Well, aye, about eh well, twenty-two, twenty-three miles. They've worked it out; that seems to be the point that all normal energy, readily-ehaccessible sugars,
M608 mm
M642 //[inaudible]//
F643 //But would,// could you prevent hitting the wall, by taking glucose tablets or something like that, before that point, if you were aware you were getting to it?
M642 You can try but your metabolism might not accept
F643 //Right, mmhm//
M608 //mm//
M642 because your metabolism, eh, is taking on your kind of normal body eh reserves.
F643 uh-huh
M642 And, even though you are shipping that stuff in, it might not have the ability, it doesn't //normally have the ability//
F643 //oh aye, [inaudible]//
M642 to //make use of it.//
F641 //For it to process// //it.//
F643 //uh-huh// //uh-huh//
M608 //mm//
M642 Because you've gotten to that stage of crazy total fatigue that it's just saying, ehm, I'm on A Mode, and you're trying to //push in//
F643 //mmhm//
M642 B.
F643 I //suppose it//
M642 //And//
F643 it must be a point where you won-, I mean that the the the difference between your spirit or your soul, //and the mechanical object you//
M642 //Aye, it is.//
F643 live in. //must be very apparent, cause it's just no [inaudible]//
M642 //It's it, aye, there's a lot of that in it.// We went through the, what's the park where the er the historic, the history museum, what do you call them?
F643 Kelvingrove?
M642 eh, what do you call, the guy that, all the //[inaudible] pruch-//
F643 //oh Burrell?//
M642 Burrell!
F643 [laugh] //[laugh] [?]what do you mean[/?]//
M642 //Right. You've got all these//
F643 [?]Pruch![/?] //[laugh]//
M642 //Aye, he [?]pruched[/?] them from all over the world.// erm The road humps.
M608 oh aye.
M642 They're mountains.
F643 [laugh] //[laugh]//
M642 //Honestly.//
F643 [laugh]
M642 Anything, anything that creates a problem about linear movement.
F643 uh-huh
M642 Even if it's every now and then. You've got to step a couple of inches higher. And it kicks in, and it's, it kills you, it really does. But you've got to have done it, I I mean I I cannae, I cannae //actually explain it.//
F643 //No it is, it's difficult// //to//
M608 //hm//
F643 perceive of that degree of
M642 Aye. //[inaudible]//
F643 //determination, I suppose, or// //[inaudible] [laugh]//
M642 //Aye, th- that's what happened.// //I [exhale]//
M608 //Especially for me, cause I'm fundamentally lazy.//
M642 //That's what actually happens.//
F643 //Aye, so am I. [laugh]// //[laugh]//
M642 //You// get to a stage where your body says, "The game's a bogie". "Gie up."
M608 mm
M642 And, eh, the trouble is, there are tens of thousands of people, lining the street.
F643 //oh pride!//
M608 //Shouting// //shouting//
F643 //Pride!//
M608 Jimmy Jimmy! //[laugh]//
F643 //[laugh]// //[laugh] Aye, but that's//
M642 //So I don't I don't I don't//
F643 //a normal Glasgow chant, to shout, 'Jimmy, Jimmy'. They could maybe have been cheering you on and you would never have known it.//
M608 //[laugh]//
M642 //What do you mean, 'Jim'?//
F643 //It's 'Hi Jimmy!'// this //and 'Hi Jimmy' that.//
M642 //oh I've never//
M608 //"Go on yersel, Jimmy".//
M642 heard that.
F643 //oh you've not lived.//
M608 //oh aye.//
F643 //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]// //[laugh]//
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //It's a sheltered life there in Stewarton.//
M642 //mm//
F643 //[laugh]//
M642 Honestly. That was amazin. To try and get the last couple of miles. oh and see the first time you go into Glasgow Green.
M608 mmhm
M642 You've got hundreds of folk lining it. [inhale] And you go into the Green. And there's the avenue. And there's a kick, a dog leg that way. You don't know there's another four hundred yards to go.
F643 [laugh] oh no; do you think you're near the end?
M642 Everybody's there. And everybody's gathered round, the the entrance here, and you're going "yes, yes, yes", and you're going, and then you go, "oh f-f-f- fuck".
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]//
M642 //Before, you go away doon there.//
F643 //[laugh]// //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
M642 That's when people died.
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]//
M642 Kenny, who ran more marathons than the rest of us, and eh, got the fastest time of all; he got down to about three minutes, eight se-, eight minutes. Whereas we were all about, sorry, sorry, three hours three hours eight minutes.
F643 //uh-huh//
M608 //mm//
M642 W-w- a, my fastest was three twenty-six. And, //erm//
F643 //[laugh]// For twenty-six miles?
M642 Yeah. And, eh //er Kenny,//
F643 //No wonder you're knackered.// //[laugh]//
M642 //Kenny// did about five, six, seven marathons, got down to that level But see in that one, [laugh] he went over the line and he collapsed, and they put him in a wheelchair and put the wrap //you know the sort of clingfilm wrap on him,//
F643 //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
M642 //and wheeled him across.//
F643 //[laugh]// //[laugh]//
M608 //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]//
F643 [laugh]
M642 He was, total space pilot. //He just, totally [?]lost it[/?].//
F643 //[laugh] oh//
M608 //[laugh]//
F641 //[laugh]//
F643 dear.

This work is protected by copyright. All rights reserved.

The SCOTS Project and the University of Glasgow do not necessarily endorse, support or recommend the views expressed in this document.

Close

Cite this Document

APA Style:

Conversation 03: Ayrshire couple on motorcycling. 2021. In The Scottish Corpus of Texts & Speech. Glasgow: University of Glasgow. Retrieved January 2021, from http://www.scottishcorpus.ac.uk/document/?documentid=353.

MLA Style:

"Conversation 03: Ayrshire couple on motorcycling." The Scottish Corpus of Texts & Speech. Glasgow: University of Glasgow, 2021. Web. January 2021. http://www.scottishcorpus.ac.uk/document/?documentid=353.

Chicago Style

The Scottish Corpus of Texts & Speech, s.v., "Conversation 03: Ayrshire couple on motorcycling," accessed January 2021, http://www.scottishcorpus.ac.uk/document/?documentid=353.

If your style guide prefers a single bibliography entry for this resource, we recommend:

The Scottish Corpus of Texts & Speech. 2021. Glasgow: University of Glasgow. http://www.scottishcorpus.ac.uk.

Close

Information about Document 353

Conversation 03: Ayrshire couple on motorcycling

Audio

Audio audience

For gender Mixed
Audience size 1

Audio awareness & spontaneity

Speaker awareness Aware
Degree of spontaneity Spontaneous

Audio footage information

Recording person id 608
Size (min) 56
Size (mb) 218

Audio relationship between recorder/interviewer and speakers

Speakers knew each other Yes

Audio transcription information

Transcriber id 718
Year of transcription 2004
Year material recorded 2003
Word count 9868

Audio type

Conversation

Participant

Participant details

Participant id 608
Gender Male
Decade of birth 1950
Educational attainment University
Age left school 17
Upbringing/religious beliefs Protestantism
Occupation University Professor
Place of birth Ayr
Region of birth S Ayr
Birthplace CSD dialect area Ayr
Country of birth Scotland
Place of residence Bridge of Weir
Region of residence Renfrew
Residence CSD dialect area Renfr
Country of residence Scotland
Father's occupation Insurance Broker
Father's place of birth Auchinleck
Father's region of birth S Ayr
Father's birthplace CSD dialect area Ayr
Father's country of birth Scotland
Mother's occupation Dental Receptionist
Mother's place of birth Ayr
Mother's region of birth S Ayr
Mother's birthplace CSD dialect area Ayr
Mother's country of birth Scotland

Languages

Language Speak Read Write Understand Circumstances
English Yes Yes Yes Yes In most everyday situations
Portuguese Yes No No Yes When trying to communicate with my in-laws
Scots Yes Yes Yes Yes In domestic/activist circles; reading literature

Participant

Participant details

Participant id 641

Participant

Participant details

Participant id 642
Gender Male
Decade of birth 1940
Educational attainment College
Age left school 18
Upbringing/religious beliefs Protestantism
Occupation Teacher
Place of birth Ayr
Region of birth S Ayr
Birthplace CSD dialect area Ayr
Country of birth Scotland
Place of residence Ayr
Region of residence S Ayr
Residence CSD dialect area Ayr
Country of residence Scotland
Father's occupation Motor engineer
Father's place of birth Ayr
Father's region of birth S Ayr
Father's birthplace CSD dialect area Ayr
Father's country of birth Scotland
Mother's place of birth Colmonell
Mother's region of birth S Ayr
Mother's birthplace CSD dialect area Ayr
Mother's country of birth Scotland

Languages

Language Speak Read Write Understand Circumstances
English Yes Yes Yes Yes Daily

Participant

Participant details

Participant id 643
Gender Female
Decade of birth 1960
Educational attainment University
Age left school 17
Upbringing/religious beliefs mix of protestantism and catholicism
Occupation unemployed
Place of birth Irvine
Region of birth S Ayr
Birthplace CSD dialect area Ayr
Country of birth Scotland
Region of residence S Ayr
Residence CSD dialect area Ayr
Country of residence Scotland
Father's occupation Toolmaker
Father's place of birth Bordeaux
Father's region of birth Dordogne
Father's country of birth France
Mother's occupation Housewife
Mother's place of birth Kinross
Mother's region of birth Perthshire
Mother's birthplace CSD dialect area Kinr
Mother's country of birth Scotland

Languages

Language Speak Read Write Understand Circumstances
English Yes Yes Yes Yes Day to day
French Yes Yes Yes Yes On holiday

Close