Document 805

Conversation 12: Two male students chatting about pastimes

Author(s): N/A

Copyright holder(s): SCOTS Project

Audio transcription

M816 There's a lot of that flu goin around, //so,//
M815 //Chicken,// bird flu or something. Don't know //what it is.//
M816 //No, that's not// arrived yet. //But apparently//
M815 //No.//
M816 they're stockpiling antivirals for that, so.
M815 Plus, we got a, we got letters into the flat the other day saying that none of us have had wir MMR jags yet.
M816 Have you not ever had an MMR?
M815 No, cause apparently, erm, it only started when I was about, know how they give it out in primary schools and that now? It started when I was, I don't know, twelve or something, //so I never got it.//
M816 //uh-huh//
M815 So, need to go down and get it.
M816 Ah well you see whe- in my day, you just caught //mumps and measles//
M815 //[laugh]//
M816 and rubella, you got //[inaudible]//
M815 //[cough]//
M816 It was a case of, somebody down the street had chicken-pox, so [laugh] you got sent down to see them. [laugh] //"Just go doon//
M815 //Aye.//
M816 just go doon the street and play with so-and-so. They've got chicken-pox." [laugh]
M815 I had chicken-pox when I was young, so //I've never//
M816 //Aye.//
M815 really
M816 Well that was it. It was a case of catch them all. //[inaudible] "So-and-so//
M815 //uh-huh//
M816 down the street's got mumps, away you go and play wi them, so you ended up wi mumps and measles. I don't think I ever had rubella, but in our //day it was called German,//
M815 //[laugh] Rubella?//
M816 in oor day it was called German measles, so //Ye ye never//
M815 //Ah,// //it's a bit too,//
M816 //bothered aboot it.//
M815 bit too exotic, rubella, don't know, measles.
M816 Mmhm
M815 It's alright.
M816 Aye.
M815 I've never really had a breakage either. I cracked my head open when I was when I was young.
M816 Oh God, I've broken about every bone in my body.
M815 No.
M816 None o the big, //none o the,//
M815 //Too careful!//
M816 none o the major ones. I mean, school, w- we used to finish school sort of like the end of June, cause we would be off all - I don't know how long they have off these days, but we were off for like eight weeks.
M815 About six weeks or something //now.//
M816 //Ah// we were off for like eight weeks, it was //like the whole of July and//
M815 //[cough]//
M816 and the whole of August.
M815 [sniff]
M816 And school would finish and two days later I'd be in the Vicky. //And I'd to spend the rest of the summer//
M815 //[laugh]//
M816 wi a stookie, [laugh], either o ma arms. Erm, I'm, but none of the major bones. But I've done collar bones, er shoulder bo-, shoulder blade, arms, both arms, fingers, umpteen fingers, especially when I started //to work in the steel works.//
M815 //Oh, no.// //I'd hate tae break a finger.//
M816 //Erm,// Umpteen fingers, er, ankles, toes. I've even broken bones in my foot. Erm, I've broken both, both legs. //But the//
M815 //I must just be//
M816 the shins, not the the femur. Oh I've done the lot.
M815 I must have just been lucky. //That's like,//
M816 //Yeah.//
M815 I hit my head off a radiator, when I was aboot five. And that's like one o ma, that's like one o ma earliest memories, crackin ma head open and bein held over a bath while I //bled intae the bath.//
M816 //[laugh]// [laugh] //[laugh] See the//
M815 //I used, I used to go, I//
M816 sympathy ye get fae yer mither. //Don't make a mess o the carpet!//
M815 //Yeah. [laugh]// //Yeah.//
M816 //[laugh]// //[laugh] That, that's//
M815 //You shouldn't use the good towels either: [?]that was[/?] a tea-towel or something, dabbin ma head.// I used to do mountain-biking and all that, but I don't know, I must have been quite careful. //Oh//
M816 //Uh-huh//
M815 I've no got a bike up here. I live in, eh, down in Patrick Cross.
M816 Mmhm
M815 D- sort of Dumbarton Road, Benalder Street.
M816 Yeah I know where //ye are.//
M815 //Yeah?// //Across fae,//
M816 //Yeah, I know the area well.//
M815 across from the Partick Tavern.
M816 Aye.
M815 I don't really like the Partick Tavern though.
M816 Is it old man's //pub?//
M815 //[laugh]//
M816 [laugh] Ma //kind of pub. I//
M815 //[laugh]//
M816 I don't like these pubs with their blaring music, aye.
M815 I don't, I'm not I'm not a //part of a union or anythin.//
M816 //[cough]//
M815 I never bothered to join in the Union, //keep ma.//
M816 //Yeah.//
M815 Mm
M816 Yeah. I joined the QM, primarily because apparently the food's better in there than it is in the GU.
M815 I I go to the, I went to the Hub last year, but I go to the one up near English, the English Department now.
M816 Mmhm
M815 Know where that is? //It's like//
M816 //Uh-huh//
M815 the dining rooms up there. //That's where I go.//
M816 //Yeah.// I'm in the Mature Students' Association. We've got our own rooms.
M815 Aye, on Oakfield //Avenue, yeah.//
M816 //Doon Oakfield Avenue.// And we've got a kitchen, microwaves, and a fridge and a freezer, so I usually nip intae Asda and get so many ready-meals, especially when there's a special offer, like three for a fiver, //and stick them in the freezer.//
M815 //Yeah.//
M816 So I can always nip in there and stick stuff in the microwave and warm it up.
M815 So what is it you do, you work as? //[inaudible]//
M816 //I work, oh I work// for Royal Mail, but I wor- I I work as a postman at the moment for Royal Mail.
M815 Yeah.
M816 Was to, you see, th- the the plan was to make me redundant. //And I was gonnae//
M815 //Yeah.//
M816 come back to University and get ehm, I've got a degree in Engineering.
M815 Yeah.
M816 All right? Which British Steel paid for, many many years ago. And eh, I was gonnae come back and do an Arts degree when they made me redundant. And they never made me //redundant, so//
M815 //[cough]//
M816 [laugh] I'm sort of hangin on there primarily for the pension, to be quite honest wi you. Ehm, cause I've got, my own pension, well, wi British Steel when ye turned eighteen, er you then started to make, you then started to pay into the pension fund. They started to take the contributions off you when you were eighteen. And I remember sittin in the works' canteen, cursin and swearin and jumpin up and doon, cause I'd got my wage slip, and //they were pe-//
M815 //Yeah, they takin money off you?//
M816 pension cut, a pension, I'm eighteen years old, pension! Good grief! And er, but see now, I mean I could kiss them, I'm tellin ye. Huh, yes!
M815 I've no got a [?]lot o foresight[/?]. See I, eh, what I wanted to do was, I didn't, I've never really known what I wanted to do, I wanted to go to Art School. //I do//
M816 //Mmhm//
M815 a bit o photography quite a lot. I've always done it, but then I kind of bottled it a wee bit, and decided I didn- I didn't, wasn't good enough, so I didn't bother.
M816 Yeah.
M815 And then ehm. Like I did quite well in school and that, so they says, "Look, we'll try to get ye down to Cambridge." So I went down to Cambridge and I got in. And then I bottled it again, I'm like "Na, I don't don't really belong down there, so I'll just not bother."
M816 uh-huh
M815 And then I came here at the like the very very last minute.
M816 Aye.
M815 So it's like a
M816 So where are you from originally?
M815 Er, I'm from a place called Gourock, which is near Greenock. Sort of
M816 That's across the r-. Aye, I know Gourock //well.//
M815 //Yeah.//
M816 I used tae winch a lassie from //Greenock.//
M815 //[laugh]// //It's like across from Dunoon.//
M816 //Many years ago.// Aye. Many years ago. Gourock is one street. //[?]Little toon.[/?]//
M815 //Yeah, it's tiny.//
M816 And is, is the swimming pool still there?
M815 Yeah, [?]Oban[/?] baths, it's like an open-air baths.
M816 Aye, sort of erm.
M815 [laugh] It's like a heated pool, but it's not got a roof on it.
M816 That's right, yeah. //[inaudible]//
M815 //And then like// er, if it's, if it's like a windy day, you've got all the sea, the //like, the Clyde's right there, so the spray comes right off.//
M816 //The spray comes off, aye, comes off the, aye.// I know Gourock well. //Aye.//
M815 //It's like// the worst idea ever. "Let's let's build an open-air pool, and just stick it right next to the Clyde."
M816 Ah, but they were healthy. //It was good for you in those//
M815 //I suppose so.//
M816 days. It was, every place had one. There's ehm, was it [inaudible] I think, North Berwick. It's listed because it's it's Art Deco //sort of artwork.//
M815 //Don't know, don't know if// it's Art Deco.
M816 And there's one up at Stonehou- ehm, I was gonna say Stonehouse. Stonehaven up beside Aberdeen. There's one there as well. It was supposed to be healthy for you, to go out there in the open air and swim.
M815 Aye. //[?]Just aboot.[/?]//
M816 //In Scotland!// [laugh] //[laugh]//
M815 //I mean if you went// down there now, there'd just be loads of wee neds running about, just //tryin//
M816 //Aye.//
M815 chuck ye in [inaudible]
M816 Yeah. That was that was healthy, good bracing sea //air. It was good for you. [inhale]//
M815 //There was a, there was a fish in it one day.// That was a, that was a highlight of my summer once. //when I went into Gourock pool and there was a fish in it.//
M816 //[laugh]// //How did it get in there?//
M815 //It's like where we were. I don't know.// //[inaudible]//
M816 //How on earth did it get there?//
M815 Maybe it was like a jumpin fish. //Don't know. But there was a fish.//
M816 //[inaudible]// //Yeah.//
M815 //And they all had// to get out of the pool, and there was like girls screamin, runnin about.
M816 Aye.
M815 Man, that was a fish, fish in the pool.
M816 Aye. [laugh] //[laugh]//
M815 //We had a// we had a killer whale, apparently out in the Clyde, down where I stay. [inaudible] It was called Clydie. //Peop-//
M816 //Aye.//
M815 People kept seein it.
M816 Yeah.
M815 And then up, up at Kilmacolm now, apparently, this gardener keeps seeing a panther walking about.
M816 Aye, there's supposed //to be a few places//
M815 //Yeah.//
M816 in Scotland have got them. They're sort of big cats that are about the //place. There seems to be quite,//
M815 //Don't know. It's probably just a big dog, or something.//
M816 there seems to be quite a few o them around. A lot of people are seeing them. //We do//
M815 //Mm//
M816 quite a bit, do quite a bit o hill-walking and climbing an
M815 Yeah, ma dad's into that. He done, ma dad's done the West Highland Way a few times, //and that.//
M816 //Has he?// Good. I've done it, I've done it South to North, North to South, and I've done the Ironman Challenge.
M815 Hm
M816 You start at //Fort William,//
M815 //[cough] [sniff]//
M816 and you go for twenty-four hours. Just right //through.//
M815 //Non-stop.//
M816 And the idea is to get at least fifty-six miles. If you can get fifty-six miles you get a gold award for it, a gold medal for doin it. Erm, the first fourteen hours are fine, but see after that, you are just dead on your feet.
M815 I'm a, I'm a bit frail for that. I did, ehm, it was like middle-distance runnin I did in school.
M816 Eight hundred, fifteen //hundred, aye.//
M815 //Yeah.// So it wasn't, I co-, I mean, I'm all right at sprints, but I was never like s- up there with the best in the school, but middle distance, that was ma //that was ma thing.//
M816 //Aye.//
M815 And cyclin as well. //That's just//
M816 //Aye.//
M815 what I've got the build for. I was never really good at, see when they put me in football or rugby or something, and they would just //tear me to pieces.//
M816 //I played, I// played football for the school, and er, we had a great team, one year. And er, we reached the semi-final o the Scottish, Scottish Schools Cup.
M815 Yeah.
M816 And er, and in the semi-final, this great big heifer //of a centre-half//
M815 //[cough]//
M816 took a swing at me, and he hit me on the sole of ma foot, and he actually broke two bones in //ma foot. Aye!//
M815 //Hell, just by, kickin it?//
M816 Er, aw he was, erm, and I ended up with two broken bones in my foot, and I missed the final, and I never got my medal. I was furious, I was furious. But the guy that played goals for us was a guy called Dougie Thomson, who is the bass player in Supertramp. [laugh]
M815 I've heard the name, but, you know.
M816 Aye. Aye, Supertramp, we'd quite, we'd quite a few, eh, Midge Ure was at school wi me as well.
M815 Ultravox? //Yeah.//
M816 //Yeah.//
M815 My mum likes Ultravox.
M816 Aye. And I can go way back further than that. I can remember him playing wi, what was it they were called? They were called Salvation. And then they got a recording contract, and they were called Slick, they were one-hit wonders.
M815 No, never heard o them. //I went out//
M816 //Uh-huh//
M815 I went out with a girl, and her dad was in a band with the drummer, used to be a drummer in Orchestral Manoeuvres in the Dark.
M816 Aye.
M815 Back in the day. I didn't know they had a drummer, I thought it was just like synthesisers and all that. I don't know. Maybe she was just trying to impress me.
M816 Aye, there's sometimes, remember, the guy, ye ye, he may have just been paid.
M815 Yeah.
M816 I mean Ronnie Woods is not a member of the Stones, but he gets paid something like fifty million pounds for a tour. [laugh]
M815 Sit and do a wee, [inaudible] try it in the back-room.
M816 Aye. Apparently Jasper Carrott's banned from Rolling Stones tours, cause they say he's a bad influence //on Ronnie Woods.//
M815 //[cough]//
M816 [laugh] //[laugh] Jasper//
M815 //Jasper Carrott?//
M816 Carrott is ba-. He's a pal o Ronnie Woods apparently.
M815 The comedian?
M816 Aye. An eh he's banned from Rolling Stones tours. They won't allow him to co-, they won't allow him to come anywhere near them when they're on tour, because he's a bad influence on Ronnie Woods. [laugh] Can you imagine that? [laugh] //[laugh] Ca- [laugh] I mean, no! [inaudible]//
M815 //He seems like, [cough]. He doesn't seem very rock and roll, does he, Jasper Carrott?//
M816 see that at all, I mean gonnae c-, I mean how can how can anybody be a bad influence? You've got Keith Richards //there. [laugh]//
M815 //Yeah, on the Rolling Stones, you know?//
M816 [laugh]
M815 I'm not, I mean I tried to play the guitar a bit, and all the way through school, but it's just one of those things, I think, you either have it or you don't.
M816 You've got to persevere with //it. And//
M815 //Yeah.//
M816 you got to get through the callouses //on the fingers. [laugh]//
M815 //[laugh] I know, it's// //Ah, I tried my best//
M816 //Uh-huh//
M815 I'm I'm I'm mediocre at best //when I'm playing the guitar.//
M816 //Ach, I play guitar.// I play, but you've gotta rel- I don't play it so much these days. but, in my day, it was big folk thing was the
M815 Yeah.
M816 the things, big folk revival, and ehm, oor school had a folk club at the time. And er the teacher that ran it originally. God, what was his name? Erm, Buchan, Norman Buchan, and then he went, he went on to become Labour MP for, it was East Renfrewshire. And the guy that replaced him was Adam MacNaughton, and Adam MacNaughton's done a lot of sort of music-hall songs, jeely piece songs.
M815 Mm
M816 "They're pullin doon the buildin", no, "They're pullin doon the prison next to oors" aboot Duke Street prison, and "The Number forty-six bus", he wrote all those. He was a mixed on, so he looked after the folk club, so of course you'll, there was a whole crowd of us.
M815 Yeah.
M816 I mean, Jim Ure would be playing guitar. Know what I mean? And we used to have concerts at lunchtime in the in the school, so you got up and you did your turn, sort of, we we all sort of play [inaudible]. So you couldnae move in the school //for guys//
M815 //Yeah. [laugh]//
M816 luggin aboot //guitars. [laugh]//
M815 //[cough] [sniff]//
M816 So every class, at the front of the class, be half a dozen guitars piled up.
M815 Yeah, that's mostly what I would be doin, most of the time, carryin it //about for//
M816 //Uh-huh//
M815 just for the //effect.//
M816 //Mmhm//
M815 Didn't really, //didn't really work.//
M816 //It's it,// it's gettin past the the sore, the the callouses.
M815 I know.
M816 On the left hand especially, and then you've got to just keep the nails short on the left hand, but sort of well, especially if you're going to learn to play like Spanish guitar, you've got to learn to, //the nails have got to be long on the right hand.//
M815 //[inaudible]//
M816 So you've got to keep working away at them. So what other classes you doin?
M815 Er, I do Level 2 Philosophy and First year History.
M816 How do you find Level Two Philosophy? I did it last year in first, but I cannae make it this year cause the lectures are too early.
M815 It's all right. I mean, I mean, you do logic, like formal logic, you know, aw these wee symbols and aw that, //which I don't really//
M816 //Mmhm//
M815 mind, cause I did a, I did maths to quite a a like a high level in school, //cause I needed like//
M816 //Mmhm//
M815 A-levels, if I was goin down south, so they made me sit down and do all these maths things. Ma brain doesn't work that way. //So I//
M816 //Eh//
M815 really had to sit down and work at it, and I'm finding it's the same thing this time. I don't know. It's just over ma head most of the time. //And ehm//
M816 //It was a lot//
M815 the other, the other thing is, It's like, when you say to people, "Oh, yeah, I do Philosophy", and they'll say things like "Oh yeah, so, you look at a table and go 'is that table really there?', that kind of stuff."
M816 Aye, //aye.//
M815 //And that's// actually what we're doin in //Philosophy just now!//
M816 //[laugh]// //[laugh]//
M815 //And I'm like, "Yeah.// //We are tryin to figure out if this table's actually there."//
M816 //[sniff] Yeah.// //Mm Back//
M815 //I don't know. Don't know.//
M816 back to Descartes. //[laugh]//
M815 //Yeah.// Yeah, it's like all that sort of doubt stuff.
M816 Yeah.
M815 But eh, more extreme level.
M816 Mm Can you really believe it, if all this is in existence, or? I've got, I I've got some friends who are Buddhists, an oh, what was their one? Aye and they were discussing the other night, and there, Na- Nagrajuna's contradiction.
M815 What's that?
M816 Ehm, the ultimate truth is that there's no ultimate truth. I says, is that no just a tautology?
M815 Yeah, how can how can that be the ultimate truth if there's no //ultimate truth?//
M816 //The ultimate// truth, I've said "Is that no just a tautology?" //It's just like//
M815 //[cough]//
M816 like "How can you prove or disprove that? It's impossible."
M815 Yeah. I'm not, n- not really religious, ma family really, no.
M816 Aw, I'm no maself, I said it's just that ehm, I've got these friends and they were quite into Buddhism, an
M815 Yeah.
M816 I like the mediations I have to be honest, I enjoy the //the meditations.//
M815 //The Descartes, Descartes, yeah?//
M816 Yeah. //No//
M815 //No, it's//
M816 not Descartes' meditations, but Buddhist //meditation, yeah.//
M815 //Oh, Buddhist meditation.//
M816 Quite good. Er, very good for calming the //mind [inaudible].//
M815 //Yeah, if you're getting worked up// round about exam time? //Yeah.//
M816 //Yeah, for// destressing, you know, very good for that.
M815 Yeah, I'll go I'll go out on ma bike, or if I'm down the road, I'll just go out a walk, take ma ma camera. I mean I just got a, like a a digital camera there. And I'm gettin some good stuff, //cause o the way//
M816 //Mmhm//
M815 the best way to look at a digital picture is on the monitor of a screen.
M816 Yep.
M815 And if it's on a flat screen you get this sort of light. Cause that's the way it works. //You're gettin//
M816 //Yeah.//
M815 the light comin through.
M816 Yep.
M815 And the way it works it's just i- //it really, if you're//
M816 //Mm mm// [sniff]
M815 doin the sort of light thing which I'm into just now, and you get the light comin off it, it's really sort of //It's nice and//
M816 //Mmhm//
M815 translucent, you get a nice //nice quality [inaudible] on it.//
M816 //Yeah, my my brother's a professional// //photographer.//
M815 //Yeah?//
M816 Well, at the mo-, he he lives in Australia now, and he's workin for the Australian government: they're takin all the old film stock, //kind of//
M815 //Yeah.//
M816 digitalising it, if that's the way you could put it. But so, the old cellu-, some of the, lot of the old celluloid stock, and the celluloid's beginnin to //to decompose.//
M815 //Yeah, so they// remaster it so they can keep it.
M816 Yeah. So they're puttin them all into into computers so that they can ehm, store it, you know, cause a lot of it goes way way back. He says the glass stuff is alright. That's okay at the moment.
M815 Mmhm I mean it would be like the manuscripts for Old English and all that. //You'd need to start puttin//
M816 //Yeah.// //It's it's part of Australian//
M815 //them on. [inaudible] stuff now.//
M816 history, so they've, they want to try and preserve all this stuff.
M815 If they had computers back then, the Battle of Maldon wouldn't have had all the stuff missing from it, //wouldn't it? It would have been there. Yeah.//
M816 //That's true. It would have been there.//
M815 It's like trying to explain to people you're writing an essay on a poem that doesn't have a, doesn't have //a start, and doesn't have an end.//
M816 //A start, and it doesn't have an ending.// We've just got the bit in the middle.
M815 Yeah.
M816 Yeah. Erm, that's what he does at the moment. He went eh, he decided to travel round the world, got to Australia, met an Australian girl and that was it. Just stayed there from then on in. Er, married her and that's him. And eh, he just works away for the. He was, he still goes oot and does photography. I was oot with him, I was over and ehm we went up to Northern Territories to visit, it's ehm [inhale] an Aboriginal sort of commune.
M815 Yeah.
M816 [cough] But they're artists. And he went up there to, eh, take photographs and do videotaping them working.
M815 Yeah.
M816 How the the Aborigines work, cause it's not sort of, an Aboriginal piece of art is not sort of one artist, it's like a group of them and they all //work together, to collaborate,//
M815 //Collaborate, yeah?//
M816 They do different bits of //it, different pieces of it.//
M815 //[cough]//
M816 Ehm, and the original ones, those that lived in rainforests, they did it on sort of tree bark, which ma- which will last a while. //But the ones//
M815 //Yeah.//
M816 in the desert, they actually did them on sand. And of course the next time //it rained or there was a wind come up, it just//
M815 //Yeah, the wind comes up, yeah.//
M816 blew the whole thing away.
M815 There's something, there's something quite good about that though, that eh you do this piece of art and it would just last //like that, and then it would be gone. Yeah.//
M816 //And it would just last so long and then it disappears,// and [inaudible] he does things like that. So I've spent some time with an Aboriginal commune. An artists' commune up in the Northern Territories.
M815 Mmhm
M816 Quite good watchin them work, and I got quite into Aboriginal art for a while. Eh, it's difficult to sort of understand it unless you've real- a real concept of //their their spirituality.//
M815 //Yeah, and// yeah and where they're, where they're comin from, what's goin on in their heads.
M816 Yeah, cause every animal has a, is a a deity or some form of deity, like a lizard's a deity. The snake's a deity. It depends on the various tribes which ones are which.
M815 Yeah.
M816 Er, and they've lost somethin like fifteen hundred s-, I think it's fifteen hundred tribes have actually just simply disappeared From when //Cook//
M815 //Just.//
M816 arrived till they began to settle Australia properly till,
M815 Just through the, through
M816 disease, //disease, yeah,//
M815 //and dyin away or becoming part of normal society, or?//
M816 bein Westernised. and what not, so. //But that's what he does.//
M815 //I mean, but it's// difficult though, to preserve these sort of things without putting a sort of Western imprint on them. //If you go out there,//
M816 //This is it.//
M815 and try and preserve them then,
M816 This is it.
M815 you know?
M816 Yeah.
M815 It's like, endangered species, like you go out, and you have to rear some of them in captivity to get
M816 Mmhm //There's//
M815 //to get the//
M816 apparently //there's one tribe now,//
M815 //procreation goin again.//
M816 and there's, there's only six of them left. And they're they're really worried because apparently it takes like six people to do the funeral rites.
M815 [laugh]
M816 So if. //If one//
M815 //If one of them dies they're//
M816 dies, basically they cannot bury him, or they can't bury him properly, according to the the tribe's traditions.
M815 Yeah.
M816 So [?]they're[/?] in real difficulty there. They're sort of tryin to. I don't know what what they're gonna do there. Big problem for them. And then they've lost a lot of the Aboriginal languages as well.
M815 Yeah.
M816 Huh So I was wonderin if they would let me go to Sydney and do ma ma Junior Honours year in Sydney, maybe I get to go and study Aboriginal //languages an//
M815 //[cough]//
M816 bring it back and see how they compare to English language.
M815 A friend of mine went to New Zealand for his Junior Honours year. He's doin Earth Sciences, and Geology and all that.
M816 Mmhm
M815 And that did, that did a world of good for him.
M816 Mmhm
M815 in terms of. I thought about it for a while, but I don't know. //Quite like it here.//
M816 //Oh I've//
M815 Quite like this, this wee department.
M816 I think you should always go. //You should travel;//
M815 //Yeah.//
M816 it broadens the mind.
M815 Yeah.
M816 Broadens the mind.
M815 But he di-, he came back with, he came back with a bit of an awful girlfriend. She's she's not very. We'll have to cut this bit out obviously, //in case, in case he ever comes across.//
M816 //[laugh] In case he sees it.// //[laugh] We'll skip this bit. [laugh]//
M815 //I won't name any names but. [laugh]// Ah she's she's torture some times, she really is.
M816 [throat] What, she doesn't get on wi you lot, or? //[laugh]//
M815 //No, not really, no. [laugh]//
M816 But see, that's it, because she'll regard you lot as a bad influence. You know what I mean? See women do this, wi men. I don't know why, you know? They get a guy and they're quite happy with him, but then they want to change him. I mean if we were that, if we were all right to form a relationship with, why on earth do you want //to change us?//
M815 //Yeah, I know.// Maybe they maybe they just see potential in us, and then they //have to go and//
M816 //Th- that's// apparently the, what //they say, yeah.//
M815 //[inaudible]//
M816 The only trouble is they don't tell us that they want to change us, or what's not quite right aboot us. You know, to at least let us have a chance o doin it for ourselves. Er Cause there's a website, what is it: 'The seven things' ehm, 'the seven things that men do that most upset women'. I thought brilliant.
M815 [laugh] //Take a note o these.//
M816 //Brilliant. Absolutely brilliant.// Take a note o these. //[laugh]//
M815 //[laugh]//
M816 [laugh] [inaudible] toilet seat up. Well, I always leave the toilet seat up, that's //that's a a given.//
M815 //[sniff]//
M816 That's a definite given, yep. Toilet seat goes up. //Sprinkle while you tinkle. [laugh]//
M815 //Yeah, I know. [laugh]// Well, it's quite difficult to aim sometimes, you know, it's //it's just.//
M816 //[laugh]// [laugh] //It is, espe-.//
M815 //[inaudible]// //I mean you don't know where it's gonna go sometimes.//
M816 //Well especially// four or five //pints inside you,//
M815 //[cough]//
M816 an you're swaying slightly //as well.//
M815 //[cough]//
M816 You know what I mean, and it's decided, that's it, you're goin to pee like a horse, you know what I mean? You've been hangin ontae it, you know, you should have went before you left the pub but you decided you weren't gonna go, na, I'll be alright till I get home. //Then about half//
M815 //Yeah.//
M816 way home, it's oh God, I wish I'd gone before I left the pub.
M815 It's when the cold air hits you, //and you go outside in the cold air.//
M816 //[laugh]// [laugh] [laugh] It's that last //rush up the road.//
M815 //[inaudible]//
M816 Then you're //[laugh]//
M815 //[laugh]//
M816 the zip sticks, yer fly, and ye invent new dance //steps, as ye//
M815 //[cough]//
M816 dance around tryin tae get it loosened. [laugh]
M815 I remember, erm, when I when I was at home, and I would be out and about at a mate's house, and you would come home. And it would always be, it would always be when I wasn't that drunk and I was comin in, that my mum would always come in and assume that I was.
M816 Aye.
M815 Cause I'd be makin, I'd sort of, be makin a lot of noise if I wasn't, if I was just kind of half there, and I'd be makin loads of noise and she would come out and shout. But see if I was really, sort of gone, I would be so careful, I'd be like theatrical,
M816 Aye.
M815 opening the door so //slowly and then//
M816 //Oh yeah.//
M815 creepin in.
M816 Aye, we used //to.//
M815 //And like I'm not// I'm no that bad, I'm not that //bad.//
M816 //Yeah.// //I know.//
M815 //But you know, it's just [inaudible].//
M816 We used to erm, the front door used to bang slightly. So we never used the the front door. My brother and I //always used to go in the back//
M815 //[laugh]//
M816 door and that was because we could close it quietly: she couldn't hear us comin in.
M815 The back door's always locked at ma house.
M816 Aye. //We used to go round the back//
M815 //Can never get in.//
M816 door and that way she couldnae hear us comin in. But och, I've got pfff, wandered in, up the stairs, [laugh] and eh [inaudible] decided to take a photograph, I mean //there I am lyin//
M815 //[laugh]//
M816 face down on the bed, and I've still got - this was a kind of formal do I was at.
M815 Yeah.
M816 In fact it was a Burns' Supper. And they were sellin bottles of whisky at this Burns' Supper, you just didn't buy it by the glass, we we bought bottles of it, and we bought a forty-ouncer //of Black Label,//
M815 //[laugh]//
M816 which we tanned. We bought another forty-ouncer of Black Label, which we tanned //and then we won a third one//
M815 //[laugh]//
M816 in the raffle, so you can imagine. This was from about seven o'clock till about three //o'clock the next mornin.//
M815 //Yeah, we won it in the raffle// so we can't let it go to waste now //if we won it in the raffle.//
M816 //[inaudible]// So you, and there's four of us drinkin whisky, so we worked out that we'd drank a pint and a half of whisky over that period o time. And erm, [laugh] There's a photograph of me, must have walked straight up the stairs, intae ma room, and just walked to the end of the bed, and the end of the bed's just caught me and I've just went "bump", and there I am like flat oot on the bed: coat, shoes, the suit, collar, tie. Everything is still on. And I'm lyin there, bromp, oot on the bed. In fact they decided they would bring a basin in //just in case.//
M815 //[laugh]//
M816 And there's the basin lyin at the side of the bed, just in case I needed it. God I was hung over for aboot three //days after that. I decided never//
M815 //[cough]//
M816 again. I'm not gonna do this again. Oh //Nightmare.//
M815 //Ah but ye get ye// ye get back on again, don't you? //You th- yeah.//
M816 //Ye always do.// Ye always do. And then ma mates and I, or wh- certainly ma mates, never get drunk and fall asleep. Cause that's you, you you are for it. I mean, we've taken pinkin shears to people's hair.
M815 [sniff]
M816 We've done stripes through their hair. Erm, we've done stripes on the eyebrows.
M815 [sniff] //Do you shave the eyebrow off?//
M816 //You know.// //Ah we'll take it, well what//
M815 //That happened to that guy.//
M816 we've done is we've taken the the the outside half of one off and the inside half of //the other one off.//
M815 //[laugh]//
M816 [laugh] So, the choice is, just take them all off, or go aboot lookin like //a numpty.//
M815 //[laugh]//
M816 Er, stripes through //people's hair.//
M815 //That's quite devious.//
M816 We've done stripes that way, we've done them that way. It's a no-no, do not fall asleep. Ye've had it, cause eh that's it, we just, "oop get the scissors out." One guy, you see, one guy we took pinkin shears, you know what pinkin shears are?
M815 No.
M816 That's the ones that when you cut they leave a zig-zag edge.
M815 [laugh] //[laugh]//
M816 //[laugh]//
M815 Where did you g-, were they just lyin about?
M816 [laugh] //Had these pinkin shears//
M815 //[cough]//
M816 in the house, //so we just//
M815 //[?]Oh, let's go[/?].//
M816 decided to take them to his hair. [laugh] //[laugh]//
M815 //If there was pinkin shears lyin about you know I would probably use them as well.//
M816 [laugh] [?]What a state![/?] [laugh] So he'd to go to the hairdresser [inaudible] to get his head shaved, to get it sorted. //[laugh]//
M815 //[cough] [sniff]//
M816 Oh no, we're a nightmare, don't don't get drunk wi oh oh But when we go oot, oh, man alive, it's it's it's crazy stuff. You'd hink we'd know better at oor age, //as well, but no.//
M815 //Yeah, I know.//
M816 Ah //[inaudible]//
M815 //Just get worse.//
M816 there. That's it. [?]However.[/?] That's us, right, you know, it's about ten o'clock at night, eleven o'clock at night. Where are we goin noo? Lap-dancin club, right! //[inhale]//
M815 //[laugh]//
M816 What the hell are we goin there for? I've absolutely no idea. I mean. You're [?]flung intae[/?] this room. Some naked lassie dances in front o you, you end up wi a hard-on and they fling you oot into //a room full o guys.//
M815 //[cough]// [cough] //[cough]//
M816 //[inaudible]// and you're paying for the privilege. We're off oor heads. Prefer to go to the casino. //I'd rather//
M815 //[?]I haven't[/?]//
M816 lose ma money that way.
M815 Yeah.
M816 Aye.
M815 No.
M816 [inaudible] Oh we're a nightmare. Yeah, I say, ye'd think we'd know better, but no. Crazy stuff. Big football match, right? Everybody, pound a head, who are we puttin the money on? First scorer, see who's gonna score a goal first. Always goes down. We're aw sittin watchin this match one time, it was a penalty, we aw jumped up, "penalty, yes!" cause it was the team that we'd the money on.
M815 Yeah.
M816 And then it dawned on us that the penalty taker's no the guy that we've got the money on. So that was //no not penalty, not penalty, no no no.//
M815 //[Tut] [laugh]//
M816 But he missed it thankfully. So we managed to save, managed to save the money, but somebody else scored, so that was it. Bet doon the tubes again.
M815 Mm Ma biggest problem when I go out is cause I look too young. So it doesn't matter, doesn't matter where I go, I'll get ID'ed. And I'll get ID'ed in the same place every time I go up to the bar. //Even by the same person, yer like//
M816 //Mmhm Aye.//
M815 "yer jist, yer jist takin the piss now, yer jist doin this tae //get on ma nerves".//
M816 //[laugh]// But a lot of them have go to be ca- I mean I can understand a lot of them bein careful. [inaudible] It's twenty-one, some pubs.
M815 Yeah, I know.
M816 In there you must to be at least twenty-one before they'll they'll even entertain you. You know what I mean? I can understand it, cause, if it's [inaudible] the licence goes, and especially if there's they're aw big, they're aw big //chains.//
M815 //Yeah.//
M816 You know, they just can't afford to have the hassle and the aggravation. Eh, cause there's a couple o pubs in Glasgow at the moment; their licences are a bit iffy, for one reason or ither. You know, but eh there you go. I can understand it. I just wish they'd ID me. //Make ma day.//
M815 //[laugh]//
M816 [laugh] [sniff]
M815 Ah, it's just annoying, you just, you just get it, just get your ID out before you even to the door now, //and just go "There you go".//
M816 //Aye, you might as well.//
M815 Yeah.
M816 Might as well.
M815 I know what's comin. //You know?//
M816 //Yeah.// We used to do it at sixteen. "Two cans of Carlsberg please." "You eighteen?" "Of course I am." [laugh]
M815 Ah, me, me and ma mates, we all, we found this guy, and he was like an absolute big hulk of a guy. And then we started hanging about with him cause he could get us drink.
M816 Mmhm
M815 Yeah. //[laugh] So that was that.//
M816 //[laugh]//
M815 Turned out to be an alright guy, actually. He was just this kind of quiet guy. He was just sort of this big, guy, he had really sort of long hair and he had a huge big growth on him.
M816 Uh-huh
M815 And he just used to sort of walk about like sort of, //this big yeti or something.//
M816 //Uh-huh// Aye, so, aye, uh-huh we were the same. Sandy, he was aboot se-, even at sort of seventeen he was about six feet four and aboot seventeen stone, so we used //to send him in "In you go!" [laugh]//
M815 //[laugh]//
M816 "There's the money - in you go!" //[inhale]//
M815 //[sniff]//
M816 Half a dozen cans o Carlsberg Export. God, we thought we were livin.
M815 [cough]
M816 Yeah. Ten Embassy tips and [laugh] and a couple o cans o Carlsberg, Ah, that was us, we were there, we'd arrived.
M815 I mean, we did it, it was like wee bottles of Merrydown we used to get, the cider.
M816 Uh-huh The thing I can't understand. Have you ever tasted that Buckfast?
M815 Buckfast is horrible, //you know, I thought, I thought I would//
M816 //God, I've taste-//
M815 have to try it just before I
M816 I was the same, I had to try it cause they were all drinkin //this Buckfast.//
M815 //I know.//
M816 I've tasted better //medicine.//
M815 //[laugh]// It's like ehm, there's another one you can get, Tudor Rose, which is even cheaper and it's even //worse.//
M816 //Oh// God, I don't know, I think I'll //gie that a skip.//
M815 //So we so we// we we bought the both of them when we were goin to someone's house once just to see what it was like, //you know just//
M816 //Aye.//
M815 so cause it was something to say we'd done. //They're horrible,//
M816 //Aye.//
M815 it's like horrible
M816 Foul! How on earth would you? I mean you, the only reason you would drink that is to get drunk. //It's f-f-f-//
M815 //No, you wouldn't even//
M816 Foul!
M815 You would just drink something else if you were gonna get drunk.
M816 Absolutely foul. What the other? Old English - that's a foul thing as well.
M815 I don't know. Old English is alright. I don't mind I don't mind cheap ciders.
M816 No.
M815 If you just drink loads of it.
M816 Oh, I'm sorry, I've got to the stage these days where I want something a wee bit better. I've educated //my palate over the years.//
M815 //[laugh]//
M816 Sorry, no. No way, forget it.
M815 Yeah.
M816 I'm not drinking that. Yeah. Like ma single malts. Yes.
M815 I'm I'm too young to be a whisky drinker.
M816 Yeah.
M815 Comes comes with age, being a whisky //drinker, doesn't it?//
M816 //Yeah.// Yeah, you got to perse- you got to per- you got to //persevere with it.//
M815 //Yeah.//
M816 This is partly because I've got a cousin who's a real, he loves, he's a real connoisseur o the stuff. He can tell you all, he can taste it an tell you where it comes from. Yeah, that's a Lowland malt, that's a Highland malt, that's an Islay malt, that's f- Speyside, he knows all the //different ones.//
M815 //Yeah.//
M816 He can tell the characteristics. [inhale] New Year at Robert's house is, [inhale] Jesus. //You think prohibition's comin in at midnight, the way he pours the//
M815 //[laugh]// //[laugh]//
M816 //stuff.// Thank God I can walk to and from his house.
M815 Yeah.
M816 Oh
M815 Oh we went tae, er, we weren't gonnae go, but we ended up goin tae George Square this year. You know, it's not really my idea of a of a brilliant time, standing in the freezing cold wi millions of //people//
M816 //No.// //It's no, oh no my idea.//
M815 //pressed up against you, but it was alright.// We spent most of the time at my friend's hou- eh flat in Clarkston, She's just moved in there. So it was just like kind of a sort of house-warming thing as well.
M816 Mmhm
M815 And that was alright. There was a few of us there, and then time got away from us, and then we ended up gettin there [laugh] about eleven o'clock or something.
M816 Mm
M815 Standing at the back, and then we didn't even realise that it had gone twelve.
M816 Who was it this year?
M815 It was Snow Patrol. //Mm//
M816 //Mm//
M815 Don't know. They're a bit too, bit too mainstream
M816 Yeah.
M815 for me. //Aye.//
M816 //Aye.// //Well we//
M815 //That's alright// it's like, it's an it's an alright atmosphere. People are all, tend to be in quite a good mood on New Year's.
M816 Aye.
M815 And they always come by and slappin you on the back and goin "Awright? //How's it goin?"//
M816 //Yeah.//
M815 You know, like?
M816 Oh well, aye eh, my local pub, they have a New Year party. So it's like the regulars only. There's only about a hundred and fifty //actually can.//
M815 //Yeah.//
M816 You can only get about a hundred and fifty in this pub - it's quite a small pub.
M815 [sniff]
M816 So of course we get oor tickets,
M815 [cough]
M816 for it, and what they do is aboot eight o'clock they clear the pub oot. And then nine o'clock they open the doors again. //And yer back in wi the//
M815 //Yeah, let in the people wi the tickets.//
M816 tickets, and that goes on till aboot two o'clock in the mornin. Have er, Kenny, he's he's a good piano player, but he's a good amateur, but he's he'd love he'd love to have been a professional. //But he's just no good enough. He'd love to have been. No he loves//
M815 //Yeah, a concert pianist or something like that?// //Uh-huh//
M816 //jazz, I like jazz as well.// And what he does, we go back to his flat, and he sets up the flat, I mean we've got the piano, there's a drum kit, there's the plug points for guitars or anything that's electrical, there's, I mean a mic or a PA system.
M815 Yeah.
M816 Alright?
M815 You just //play?//
M816 //[inaudible]// We get a lot of the jazz musicians comin, I mean we get professional musicians //comin, I'll get ma//
M815 //Yeah.//
M816 take ma guitar up, and we'll just start to jam. And we, I mean he doesn't come to the pub, I mean, when you arrive in, I mean, there's a big, huge big thing full o Scotch broth. //[?]There's a log on[/?]//
M815 //[laugh]// //[sniff]//
M816 //Aye, [inaudible] but I mean.// Big pot full o Scotch broth, that's aw made up. Loads o bread, Scotch pies, beans. And //eh//
M815 //Oh we always// used to have steak pie in ma house when it was //New Year.//
M816 //Aye, that was the// the traditional //beef- the steak pie dinner before the bells.//
M815 //Oh used to go down to ma aunties, oh aye you would have steak pie, and//
M816 Oh
M815 and you would go, you would //aw ma//
M816 //Aye.//
M815 family would be there.
M816 Ma mother used //to, my mother//
M815 //Ma dad's family.//
M816 used to put the fire out. The coal fire, right? Put the fire out.
M815 [cough]
M816 And then, take aw the ashes, and they'd aw be taken down to the bin, and the fire would be relit. What the hell are you doin?
M815 I've h- I've heard, I've actually heard of thowing out the ashes but //but I didn't.//
M816 //Aye,// she'd throw the ashes oot just before the bells.
M815 I thought that was like a metaphor though, I didn't think it was //something you would actually//
M816 //Aye.// Aye, oh we we did. My mother used to do it. Aye, and along one wall he puts up, he puts a sheet of paper on a wall, for you to write your your New Year resolution //on it.//
M815 //Aye.// Or a wee mention or something //on the wall.//
M816 //That's it.// And eh, then we just go and we've people comin in and people goin out, an But just, I mean it's like a karaoke session, but guys arrive in, I mean we had a, we'd an eight-piece band going at one point. It was great. And there was a French girl, aye, she was a professional jazz singer //in Paris.//
M815 //Mm//
M816 Oh, we'd a ball! I apparently passed oot about six //o'clock. I passed oot//
M815 //[laugh]//
M816 aboot six o'clock in the mornin. But eh, I don't know if that was from the drink or the other substances. //[laugh]//
M815 //[laugh] We'll have to censor that as// //well, won't we?//
M816 //I don't care.// I don't care. //And//
M815 //Aye well.//
M816 er oh, we were, we'd a ball. Woke up aboot ten. [laugh] Where am I?
M815 You only got four hours' sleep? //Well that's alright.//
M816 //Aye.//
M815 No //bad.//
M816 //I always,// I've got to to Robert's cause we always go to Robert's for a
M815 Yeah.
M816 sort of, New Year's day lunch stroke dinner. And then he plies me wi whisky again, so I mean it's usually about the third or fourth of January before I really start to come round again. [laugh]
M815 I hate this havin exams at January as well.
M816 Oh
M815 Drives me mental. You come off Christmas, you know, you've over-indulged a bit at Christmas,
M816 Mmhm
M815 you're still feelin a bit weak come New Year, and then all of a sudden it's the exams comin up.
M816 And you've all these great plans for all the reading and all the work you're gonna do [laugh] over Christmas and New Year. [laugh]
M815 It usually starts wi me at the start of the new term. I always go, right I'm gonnae, need to sit down and read the books this //year.//
M816 //Yes,// New Year resolution. //[inaudible]//
M815 //Go tae every// lecture, but, I mean for like arts subjects, you don't need to go to every lecture, it's just, don't know, don't need to go. You can get it oot of a book or somethin, that's what I
M816 Well a lot of them you've got to go through the book anyway. //I mean the//
M815 //Yeah.//
M816 lectures just an outline, and you've really got to go through the book. //I'm doin economic//
M815 //Yeah.//
M816 and social history, and the lectures are really just an outline.
M815 Yeah.
M816 And every lecture, there are two, there's a mini reading list, which always has usually two or three items on it. Sometimes it's just a chapter, sometimes it's just a few //pages or maybe it's a website.//
M815 //[cough]//
M816 But you've really got to read them, but I mean you just can't do them all.
M815 Yeah, I know.
M816 And it's a case of pick three or four, because you've got to answer two questions out of fourteen, so it's a case of pick maybe two or three and really
M815 Yeah, home in on //[inaudible]//
M816 //Home in home in on// them and just hope that when they come up, ye, what comes up, the questions that come up are things that you can really go for.
M815 Yeah.
M816 Uh-huh What did you do for your essay?
M815 Er, I did the Battle o Maldon. Question number eight. //I did.//
M816 //Did you?//
M815 What did you do, //the?//
M816 //The// Latin grammar, the Greek and Latin grammar.
M815 Oh dear! You must have been the only one. I didn't know, I haven't //heard of anyone that [?]could do[/?] that one.//
M816 //I think I am, apparently.// I think I am apparently the only person that's done it.
M815 Loads of people did the names question. //That was quite an//
M816 //Mmhm//
M815 easy question, I thought, //seemed like it.//
M816 //Mmhm//
M815 And loads of people did the Battle o Maldon as well. //I don't know how anyone did the La-//
M816 //Mmhm// //I did that, uh-huh//
M815 //Seemed like quite a//
M816 modern linguistics, I like //the modern. I like the modern.//
M815 //fiendish question, yeah.//
M816 You know what I mean? The the Old English is probably ma weakest //part o the//
M815 //Yeah.//
M816 of the the three. //Yeah.//
M815 //So are you gonnae// are ye gonnae keep this on next year, or //you goin//
M816 //Er// no, I'll need tae drop it, cause I'm part-time.
M815 Yeah.
M816 So I only do two modules a year.
M815 I don't know what I'm gonna keep on, whether it'll be philosophy or this. //Don't know.//
M816 //Mm// //Yeah, so I'll I'll//
M815 //I quite like it, quite like it here.//
M816 cause I'll need to drop it and then finish off sort of Level One and Two.
M815 Yeah.
M816 And then see where I go from there. //Hopefully//
M815 //Yeah.//
M816 they'll make me redundant by that //time, and I can//
M815 //[sniff]//
M816 get to Australia.
M815 Yeah.
M816 Go to Australia and see what I can do there.
M815 You could do anything really.
M816 Mmhm Well I've got family there, so.
M815 Yeah, I know.
M816 Yeah. I mean even I I I mooted it with my eh cousin, When I was ov- when I wa-, she was on the phone at eh Christmas day, phone goes by eight o'clock on Christmas day. "Hi Mary!" //because it's whit//
M815 //[laugh]//
M816 ni- eight, nine o'clock there. "How're you doin?"
M815 A rude awakening. //[cough]//
M816 //Mmhm// Always have a blether, and I say, she says "So how's university?" I says, "Great", I said, "[inaudible] I think I could do a year in Sydney." "Aye, come and stay wi us." Yeah, good. //Cause she stays//
M815 //Mm//
M816 in a wee place called Cronulla, which is beautiful. //A lovely little//
M815 //Yeah?//
M816 town just outside Sydney, beautiful.
M815 No, I've not got any any relatives out in out in Australia. //I've got some out in//
M816 //Oh//
M815 Dublin and places //like that.//
M816 //Aye.//
M815 [inaudible]
M816 No. Gary's a, what do they call them noo? Assistant Commissionaire, it's the equivalent to like a Chief Constable,
M815 Yeah.
M816 in the new South Wales police. And in the Olympics he was in the charge of the sponsors' security. So I've, I'd always wanted to go to the Olympic Games, //so I thought ah//
M815 //Yeah.//
M816 Sydney, might as well do the whole hog and go and do the the Olympic Games in Sydney, an wi Gary bein there,
M815 Yeah.
M816 it was great, //because he's [inaudible]//
M815 //Yeah, you could get in anywhere really,// //couldn't you?//
M816 //Oh well actually I did.// //He erm.//
M815 //[cough]//
M816 There's a thing there's this thing called the Millennium Marquee. When I arrived there I went oot to ma brother's for three or four days just to get over the the jet-lag and I I watched the opening ceremony on television. And then I cont- I phoned Gary, and he says "Aye", he says, "Come up", he says, "and meet me at this place called the Millennium Marquee." Said "Aye, okey-dokey," so I arrive at this place the Millennium Marquee. [inhale] Says, "Right, in you go", he's in uniform, says, "Right, come on in, sit down", sat in front of the camera, took me photograph, "there you go", Access All Areas. //There's me wanderin aboot.//
M815 //[laugh]//
M816 Great time.
M815 Uh-huh
M816 Great time. It was a ball, it was a riot. And er, got to see got to see an Olympic Games. It was great. Especially the beach volleyball //at Bondi//
M815 //[laugh]//
M816 Beach. Yes! I don't care if this is sexist, but the female beach bolleyball, beach volleyball, yes! //[laugh]//
M815 //Aye, yer only bein honest.//
M816 [laugh] Wasn't too keen on the guys, but the girls, wonderful. They should make that, definitely //that's the new spectator//
M815 //[laugh]//
M816 sport. Definitely! [laugh]
M815 They should show it on TV rather than darts, //for example, when you've got sort of [laugh] I know.//
M816 //Oh to hell wi darts, oh yes.// Female beach volleyball? Bom. //That's the ultimate sport.//
M815 //Huge big// Huge, like obese men throwing little //pins at a board.//
M816 //Aye.// //[laugh]//
M815 //That's not really.//
M816 But do you see the way the cr- the the audience get at it?
M815 Aye, they go mental, //don't they?//
M816 //Don't they?//
M815 Try to put them off //fae the shoutin and bawlin.//
M816 //Aw// //Man alive!//
M815 //And you get their, their like// equally obese wives shouting abuse at the //other//
M816 //Aye.//
M815 contestants an //things.//
M816 //Aye.// My God, I mean how can you get so excited about darts?
M815 D'ye d'ye play golf, no?
M816 No.
M815 No, it's never //like.//
M816 //No.//
M815 Ma dad was into it for a while. //But anyway.//
M816 //No.//
M815 Wasn't good at it, so he he dropped it.
M816 Ah I subscribe to George Bernard, //was it George Bernard//
M815 //[cough]//
M816 Shaw? It's a wa- //It's a waste of a walk in the country.//
M815 //[cough]// Yeah, so he's tryin to get me to do it as well, but it's just borin, isn't it? It's //just not//
M816 //Mm// //Ma s- ma father-in-law was a//
M815 //[inaudible]//
M816 a [?]gey[/?] good amateur golfer, won his club championship, //and he sort of//
M815 //Yeah.//
M816 works championship. He worked in the Hoover in Cambuslang. And they'd a sort of golf section in there, and he won that several times, so he taught ma son. And Mark's, what, I think he plays off aboot three, no no no, it's about seven, seven I think it is now.
M815 Ma co- ma eh cousin, Jamie, he's a he's a really good golfer as well.
M816 Yeah. //But eh//
M815 //Yeah.//
M816 So he he [inaudible] sort of school holidays that was [laugh] Mark //disappearin.//
M815 //Yeah, off to the golf// //course.//
M816 //Yeah.// We never saw him for [inaudible] he disappeared about seven o'clock in the mornin, and he'd come back about nine o'clock, nine, half-past nine, ten o'clock at night.
M815 Yeah.
M816 Feed him, p-, go to his bed, and that would be him, up the next day and way back down the. He just spent his whole summer in the golf club. Doon the golf course, and played away, so.
M815 The longest time I spent on a golf course was when we camped on it one night, after we'd done our done our exams in fourth year. //[laugh]//
M816 //You// camped on a golf //course. You'd have been//
M815 //Camped on a golf course, yeah.//
M816 popular. Hope you didnae put your tent up on a green or a tee.
M815 No, it was like, out the way, right up the very very back. //Cause it's kinna//
M816 //Mmhm//
M815 there's a golf course kinna near like where we used to stay, so put a tent up on the golf course.
M816 Mmhm
M815 Can censor that as well. I won't tell you where the golf course was //in case they come, in case they come for ma blood. That was quite a good night.//
M816 //[laugh]//
M815 Set up a few tents.
M816 Yeah.
M815 Used to go campin, up in, er, there's a place called Braeside. Er, which is in Greenock. Used to go campin up in the woods behind there. But ye co- you couldn't erm let anyone know you were goin, cause all the neds would come up and they would like //try and scare you and frighten you.//
M816 //[inhale] [exhale]// There's a huge, now wait a minute, if you. There's a reservoir up above G- Greenock if I remember.
M815 Yeah, there's a few //there's.//
M816 //And there's a golf course up there.//
M815 There's a few reservoirs. Erm, you're probably thinking of like the Greenock Golf Course, but I'm talking about the Gourock Golf //Course.//
M816 //Aye.//
M815 Yeah, there's like a a dam and stuff.
M816 Yeah.
M815 There's like a wee
M816 Aye, I used tae winch this lassie frae Greenock. [sniff] Train doon to Greenock on a Friday night and t- first train back up on a Monday mornin.
M815 Uh-huh No, there's not not really much appealing about Gourock and Greenock, [inaudible]
M816 [laugh]
M815 Ye ha- ye have to get out an
M816 [laugh]
M815 experience the sort of wider
M816 [laugh]
M815 [cough] You know what I mean? //[cough]//
M816 //The g- the// [inaudible]. Is the //[inaudible] Lighthouse//
M815 //[cough]//
M816 still there?
M815 Er yeah.
M816 Aye. //There was a hotel next//
M815 //It's still there.//
M816 tae it as well. //[inaudible] Aye.//
M815 //That's still there as well, aye.// It's like, taken over by a chain or something now, so it's like a big //fancy//
M816 //I think// it used to be a Stakis one at one //time.//
M815 //Yeah, it's// not Stakis that does it anymore, it's some someone else now, but it was that //for a while.//
M816 //Yeah.//
M815 The lighthouse is just down the road //from that.//
M816 //Aye.//
M815 It's like a big white lighthouse.
M816 Mm [?]I was at one[/?] Was one New Year I got in tow with ehm it was a crowd of nu- er student nurses. And er
M815 Ma sister's a student nurse, //actually.//
M816 //Well we// set off, we set off from, it was along, they'd a flat along Great Western Road,
M815 Yeah.
M816 and we started, the New Year's party started in there,
M815 [cough]
M816 and I think on the fourth of January, we were in Barra, via Gourock, Dunoon, And I'd even managed to get to the Old Firm game on January the, the Old Firm game was still on er Ne'erday in those days, it was at Ibrox that year. And I'd actually still managed to get to the the Ne'erday game, the Ne'erday Old Firm game, and we ended up on Barra. And there were huge gaps of things I just have no //idea.//
M815 //[laugh]// You ever been to Millport?
M816 Aye, Crocodile Rock? //[sniff]//
M815 //I quite like Millport.// That's ehm, if you go down to Largs and then //jump across from there, yeah.//
M816 //That's it, jump jump across on the ferry.// Mm Aye.
M815 I used to, been tae Millport a few times wi people.
M816 Barassie, Troon, Prestwick, Ayr - oh that used to be the regular Sunday thing in the summer.
M815 Aye, I like Troon. //Troon's alright.//
M816 //Jump in the car an// drive doon to //Barassie//
M815 //[cough]//
M816 an Ayr. //an//
M815 //[cough]//
M816 Troon. Get in that water, it's good for ye! [snort]
M815 Aye, not not the Clyde anyway. //I wouldn't, ye couldn't pay me to go in the Clyde these days.//
M816 //[laugh]// //[laugh] Aye.//
M815 //Cause it's like a sewage treatment plant, into Gourock, so if you go in the water down there, you know.//
M816 There used to be a a a little ship called SS Shieldhall - there was a big sewerage plant at eh, at Shieldhall //in Glasgow.//
M815 //Yeah.//
M816 And there was a boat called the SS Shieldhall. And you could could go a cruise on the Clyde on this thing, and it was a sludge boat.
M815 [laugh]
M816 How, [inaudible] //[inaudible]//
M815 //A banana// boat, ma granny used to call it.
M816 Aye, that's it. //This was all the stuff that we used to//
M815 //Aye. [cough]//
M816 from the s- the sewerage works, got loaded on to this boat, And they took me doon the Clyde //the the Firth of Clyde.//
M815 //Took on a wee tour.//
M816 And you got sort of down south of Arran, right? And you looked off the stern o this boat, and [laugh] the water was turnin brown. //[laugh]//
M815 //There's all of this sludge comin oot from behind it?//
M816 [laugh] Where's that gonnae go? Know what I mean?
M815 [inaudible] //[inaudible]//
M816 //[?]Bet you[/?] all those// beaches along Saltcoats, Ardrossan //Ayr,//
M815 //[laugh]//
M816 Prestwick, which my mother used to tell me "Get in that water, it's good fur ye". [laugh] What? //[laugh] Aye.//
M815 //All these blind children and dogs comin out, aye.//
M816 Good grief! Ah Ye must be jokin. Aye.
M815 Oh
M816 Yeah. Y-y- you were talkin aboot d- the Gourock swimming pool havin a //a fish in it.//
M815 //Yeah, yeah.//
M816 Well, a lot of the places al- in Sydney, along part of the coast used to be a lot of these little holiday resorts that Sydney-siders used to go to for their holidays.
M815 Yeah.
M816 A a bit like Glaswegians used to go to Blackpool, Sydney-siders used to go to these places.
M815 Yeah.
M816 And they've all got sort of swimming pools, like fifty-metre swimming pools, but they're they're tidal, you know? The sea comes in, fills the swimming pool, tide goes oot, and you end up with a swimming pool. Peo-, you go you go swimmin on the east, and got to check, they they call them blueb-, the Australians call them blue-bottle, but they're actually Portuguese //man-o-war,//
M815 //[inaudible]// //Jellyfish?//
M816 //jellyfish!// //I mean ye gottae//
M815 //Those things are lethal.//
M816 [inaudible] [?]they're no half[/?]. You've got to check the the water before, you you make sure that none of these things are floatin aboot in the water, cause they get brought in.
M815 Yeah.
M816 Yeah. //Ye get//
M815 //[?]I would say that[/?]// the thing we used to do, we used to [laugh] used to go down on the beach and throw stones at them, when you were a wee guy.
M816 Aye. //Oh you see, ah well,//
M815 //Jellyfish.//
M816 oh ye see in eh, I mean, the the lifeguards'll put up signs, Blue-bottles.
M815 Yeah.
M816 Eh, and what's the other one? Blue-ringed octopuses, don't go near those things either. Eh, go tae Australia, come and visit Australia, the only c- the continent that's got the what is it, the the highest number of lethal insects and snakes in the world.
M815 Yeah, it's like they're really strict about not bringin in any foreign //yeah, fauna and flora.//
M816 //Very strict, yeah, ye get ye get searched// before ye ye arrive, and check ye, o- on the plane you've got to tick off, you haven't got these things, you haven't got that thing. The fact, eh, John was given a grant because when he bought the house he bought, it was an English garden that was in it. It was aw full of things like geraniums and aw the plants you would get here,
M815 Yeah.
M816 in the garden, but there of course they just grow all year. And eh he was given a grant to take all these plants oot, and the trees that had been planted in the garden which were all sort of European species. And he was given a grant to clear his whole garden of these plants and trees and replant it with eh indigenous species.
M815 [inhale] //Ah [inaudible]//
M816 //Because they're so// keen now. Plus the fact that ye've got to water these gardens constantly, and as he says, just [inaudible] And they have meters. You know, you turn the hose on and you just watch the meter spin. And he says that's it, get the things oot.
M815 [laugh]
M816 Put in, we'll plant indigenous species in here. And then there's there's Larry. He's got a lizard in his garden, which is indigenous, and it's gottae stay there; he can't get rid of it.
M815 Yeah, and no matter how much he wants to, //cause that's like//
M816 //Aye, so we//
M815 its habitat, I //suppose, yeah.//
M816 //Aye, it is.// See he's no bad; he's only got a lizard. His next-door neighbour's got an iguana, and this thing's aboot three //feet long.//
M815 //[laugh]//
M816 You want to see the size o this thing! Bloody hell! An it's a female. Whit? //So it//
M815 //Yeah.//
M816 well, it digs up and makes its nest, it lays its eggs, and there's nothin they can do aboot it.
M815 An you get all sorts of wee baby iguanas and stuff.
M816 Aye, nothin they can do aboot it, they've got to eh leave this thing. It's huge! It's bloody massive, //he's//
M815 //He could// //charge people to come and see it.//
M816 //[inaudible]// //Aye.//
M815 //[cough]//
M816 Oh go to hell.
M815 Yeah.
M816 [inaudible] You've got tae check the place for, er if you're ever in the outback in Australia if you go, you use a dunny, I mean there's there's no sewerage.
M815 urgh
M816 They're sort of dry toilets. And you've got to check the dunny to make sure a funnel web husnae made its its its web in the the toilet bowl. Cause they come up and they bite ye on the b- the //arse, and that's you, an these//
M815 //I don't think I could be d-//
M816 these things are serious.
M815 Don't think I could be doin wi //that, really.//
M816 //Aye.//
M815 Mm
M816 Redbacks you can spot because they've got little, they've go- actually have a red mark //on their on//
M815 //Yeah.//
M816 the back o the spider. But the one that causes all the problems's called a Huntsman. An it's not poisonous, but they've got a habit of goin intae cars. And they either go up under the dashboard or into the the sunvisor. And o course, you're wearing a pair o shorts, //and you're//
M815 //Yeah.//
M816 drivin along and you turn a corner and the sun's in your eyes, and you pull the visor down and this thing drops doon. They're huge, big and hairy and they're brown. Right? And we just don't have, I mean they're about the size of your hand.
M815 So, car crashes, //cause o that?//
M816 //Car crashes.// Aye. I opened the door o the the car one time, and one dropped oot. Onto the the grass. An I'm no jokin. Bob Beamon didnae jump further than I jumped, and I did it standin an goin backwards. //This thing, oh//
M815 //[cough]// //[cough]//
M816 //distance I// I mo- I mo- I must have landed twenty feet away from that, "Wow, what the hell's that?"
M815 In, over in Ireland and stuff, like they have like roadsigns up that tell you so many peole have died on this road, cause of car //accidents an stuff and that's supposed to put you off.//
M816 //That's right. Yeah. [laugh]// //[laugh]//
M815 //Just scares the hell oot o me, as if someone's gonnae come in the back o the// //back o ye on the bus or something.//
M816 //[laugh]// //[laugh]//
M815 //It just seems extremely morbid.// //Sixteen//
M816 //Aye.//
M815 people have died on this road //since//
M816 //Aye.// //Well we go//
M815 //two thousand and one.//
M816 when we go to Ireland, we go cycling.
M815 Yeah.
M816 [laugh] When we were over last August, we decided to cycle the Ulster Way from Newton, Newton, no White Abbey and Belfast Loch. It takes you right through to Newry.
M815 Yeah.
M816 Right. [laugh] We did it pub to pub //to pub to pub.//
M815 //[laugh]// How would you get on a bike after you've been
M816 You don't, you push it. We're in this little place called called, we- we're cyclin along sort of about lunchtime. Come on, we'll need to get somethin tae eat. This little sign "Points Pass", "ah, we'll go in there." [inaudible] this place Points Pass. There's, it's deserted! It's like ghost town. Right? And there's these orange flags are hangin oot, an I thought mmhm, yes, what's this? Every shop shut, everything shut, but the hotel's open, so we go into the hotel. And there's about four guys in the ho- in the hotel bar. I said Ireland, Saturday at lunchtime.
M815 Yeah.
M816 Four people. Place is deserted. What the hell's goin on? It was the Gaelic, Gaelic football final in Dublin.
M815 Yeah.
M816 An the local team had made it to the final, hence all the orange flags //cause that's//
M815 //Yeah.//
M816 the colour they play in. //And//
M815 //So everybody's gone up to Dublin.//
M816 they'd, the whole //town had disappeared//
M815 //Yeah.//
M816 down to Dublin except these sort of four guys and a couple of guys that worked in the b- ho- the Points Pass. We had tae stay the night. We couldnae get any further. [cough] We were absolutely pished //oot of oor//
M815 //[laugh]//
M816 heads, we were. Gutted. Cause we ke- ah, we're watchin it on the fin- big screen. And eh guys explaining the rules, and "you'll have a Guinness?" "Aye, okay then." That was us, rest of the night.
M815 Have another one.
M816 Have another one, have another one. And the guy was bringin out food. Sort of chef came out from the hotel, and was bringin out food, and all the rest of it, and that was us, whole night. Never put ma hand in ma pocket once. Pished as a fart. //Gutted.//
M815 //[laugh]//
M816 That was us. We'd tae push, luckily enough, what was it, the place we were staying for bed //an breakfast//
M815 //You should have got// bikes with stabilisers //on it, [inaudible] any trouble. [laugh]//
M816 //[cough] W- we'd a needed them.// Erm the place was only but eh, place we were stayin in was only, er, but he got us into bed and breakfast, which apparently was only about a mile along the road. We had to push //the bikes.//
M815 //[laugh]// [laugh] //[inaudible]//
M816 //Along to this// bed an breakfast, [inhale]. And the next morning we weren't doin too well either, tryin to cycle along this Ulster Way.
M815 Well you wouldn't be. Guinness is, it's a it's a funny thing, if you drink if you drink it it's a funny kind of drunk you get, it's not //I don't know.//
M816 //Aye.// //But I won't drink it here.//
M815 //On me anyway.//
M816 Pa- it's there's somethin about Guinness in Ireland that's entirely different from Guinness here.
M815 It's a bit sweet here, if you get it. //Do you know what I mean?//
M816 //Eh appa-// apparently it doesn't travel well. Apparently it doesn't travel well. I mean, the, if you go to the brew-, I mean you must have been to //the brewery in Dublin.//
M815 //Yeah, I've been// to the brewery. //Yeah.//
M816 //Done the tour.//
M815 [laugh] gone up and and had a tastin an //aw that.//
M816 //Yeah.// You doin English literature?
M815 Eh, no I dropped that //last year.//
M816 //Yeah I was// wonderin, cause if you do the Ulysses tour as well, [inaudible] doin Ulysses. You see you do the Ulysses tour round Dublin. You get, you'd actually do the tour, and you go to the various places that are mentioned in the book, at the times
M815 Yeah, cause it's a single day, //yeah//
M816 //Yeah.//
M815 obviously.
M816 That he's the- that he's there. So you actually walk rou-. You sort of walk round Dublin visiting all the places at the same times as he was there. A good way to spend a day.
M815 Yeah.
M816 Good way to spend a day.
M815 Aye, I enjoyed the tour. That was.
M816 Mmhm the distill- the the brewery.
M815 Yeah.
M816 Aye.

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Information about Document 805

Conversation 12: Two male students chatting about pastimes


Audio audience

Adults (18+)
For gender Males
Audience size 2

Audio awareness & spontaneity

Speaker awareness Aware
Degree of spontaneity Spontaneous

Audio footage information

Year of recording 2005
Recording person id 718
Size (min) 54
Size (mb) 313

Audio medium

Other Private conversation

Audio setting

Recording venue Lecturer's office
Geographic location of speech Glasgow

Audio relationship between recorder/interviewer and speakers

Not previously acquainted
Speakers knew each other Not sure

Audio speaker relationships

Members of the same group e.g. schoolmates

Audio transcription information

Transcriber id 718
Year of transcription 2005
Year material recorded 2005
Word count 12111

Audio type



Participant details

Participant id 815
Gender Male
Decade of birth 1980
Educational attainment Highers/A-levels
Age left school 18
Upbringing/religious beliefs Catholicism
Occupation Student
Place of birth Gourock
Region of birth Renfrew
Birthplace CSD dialect area Renfr
Country of birth Scotland
Place of residence Glasgow
Region of residence Glasgow
Residence CSD dialect area Gsw
Country of residence Scotland
Father's place of birth Greenock
Father's region of birth Renfrew
Father's birthplace CSD dialect area Renfr
Father's country of birth Scotland
Mother's place of birth Greenock
Mother's region of birth Renfrew
Mother's birthplace CSD dialect area Renfr
Mother's country of birth Scotland


Language Speak Read Write Understand Circumstances
English Yes Yes Yes Yes Everywhere
Scots Yes Yes Yes Yes Home / informal situations


Participant details

Participant id 816
Gender Male
Decade of birth 1950
Educational attainment University
Age left school 15
Upbringing/religious beliefs Protestantism
Occupation Student
Place of birth Glasgow
Region of birth Glasgow
Birthplace CSD dialect area Gsw
Country of birth Scotland
Place of residence Burnside
Region of residence Lanark
Residence CSD dialect area Lnk
Country of residence Scotland
Father's occupation Engineer
Father's place of birth Rutherglen
Father's region of birth Lanark
Father's birthplace CSD dialect area Lnk
Father's country of birth Scotland
Mother's occupation Buyer
Mother's place of birth Glasgow
Mother's region of birth Glasgow
Mother's birthplace CSD dialect area Lnk
Mother's country of birth Scotland